Katy Perry Farts in Front of Robert Pattinson

Katy Perry really wants Kristen Stewart and the rest of the world to know she wasn’t banging Robert Pattinson after his breakup. In fact, she has indisputable proof that she didn’t.

OK, so here’s the proof there was never anything going on with me and Robert Pattinson,” she says. “I fart in front of him. Properly fart. And I never, ever fart in front of a man I am dating. That’s a rule. He’s my bud, I’m like his big sister. We just hang out. The other day, I said: ‘One of the things I’m most proud of is not sleeping with you, Robert.’ And that’s true. Hollywood Life

I’m not sure that telling the entire world how comfortable you are in front of a guy is supposed to convince people you didn’t sleep with him but whatever. Sounds like Rob got friendzoned hard. Not just that, but Katy probably cups her farts and makes him smell it too. She didn’t just friendzone him. She’s literally rubbing his face in it.