Brad Pitt’s Attacker Was Actually Trying to Blow Him

Vitalii Sediuk, the guy who ran up to Brad Pitt at the Maleficent premiere, didn’t punch him in the face. He was just trying to bury his face in his crotch like he’s done to so many celebrities before him. Pitt tells PEOPLE it was he was the one doing the punching.

“I was at the end of the line signing autographs, when out the corner of my eye I saw someone stage-diving over the barrier at me. I took a step back; this guy had latched onto my lapels. I looked down and the nutter was trying to bury his face in my crotch, so I cracked him twice in the back of the head – not too hard – but enough to get his attention, because he did let go. I think he was then just grabbing for a hand hold because the guys were on him, and he reached up and caught my glasses.”

“I don’t mind an exhibitionist,” Pitt continues, “but if this guy keeps it up he’s going to spoil it for the fans who have waited up all night for an autograph or a selfie, because it will make people more wary to approach a crowd. And he should know, if he tries to look up a woman’s dress again, he’s going to get stomped.”

Vitalii was charged with a few misdemeanors and ordered to perform 20 days of community service. He was also put on 36 months probation and charged with $220 in fines. The judge banned him from attending any future Hollywood events by ordering him to stay 100 yards from the Staples Center and the LA Live complex where the Grammys are held.

Not too bad considering the charges. One could even say Vitalii… got off easy. Heh heh heh.