Kim Kardashian Pregnancy Upside: Bigger Boobs

Funny how women knowingly let a mucus-covered, life-sucking, undersized dwarf crawl out of their vagina. And oh, it’s one of life’s greatest joys. To have your women parts spread apart like an oyster. The pearl in this case is a crying, pooing mess that’ll leave you sleepless for a few years.

On the plus side, breasts. Yay for guys! Back in the old days before people discovered, oh, biology, men kept impregnating women because over nine moon cycles, they saw breasts get bigger and bigger. Like a gift from the gods.

Which brings us to Kim Kardashian. She’s pregnant if you haven’t heard and now, here are her breasts. On full display. In 6+ months, they’ll be the size of ham hocks. Her pregnancy hormones must be kicking in because she went on a Twitter rant against no one in particular. Women and their emotions, sheesh.

So fucking sick today on all levels!!!!! UGHHHHHHHHH I can't deal!!!!!!!!!! Praying I get through the day!

— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) June 2, 2015

Can't wait til my website is active! I'm gonna do live video streaming so every time someone talks s**t I can go blast the f**k outta them

— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) June 2, 2015

Pregnant KiKi does not play!!!! *BLOOP!*

— Kim Kardashian (@KimKardashian) June 2, 2015

What she wrote was:

So fucking sick today on all levels!!!!! UGHHHHHHHHH I can’t deal!!!!!!!!!! Praying I get through the day!

Can’t wait til my website is active! I’m gonna do live video streaming so every time someone talks s**t I can go blast the f**k outta them

Pregnant KiKi does not play!!!! *BLOOP!*

Kardashian’s going crazy. Britney Spears-level crazy, that’s the only answer. Like locks of hair strewn on the ground, wide-eyed staring out of a salon window, bald, level of crazy.

Even Kanye read her tweets and twirled his finger around his ear.