Miley Cyrus Dresses Like George Clinton, Shows Off Pasties-Covered Breasts on ‘Jimmy Kimmel’

MTV told Miley Cyrus to pump up the turnout for Sunday’s VMAs. Cyrus did the only thing she knew how to do. Stick out her breasts and babble. Cyrus hit up Jimmy Kimmel Live to crank up the marketing for the awards show. First, she walked around Hollywood in a silly wig and pretended to interview people. I bet those people were paid extras. Hollywood is fake.

She also came out for her interview with nothing but pasties on and an open blazer to make sure no one would miss those breasts.

Kimmel feigned embarrassment at such immodesty, but c’mon, that’s why he has holes in his pant pockets. Cyrus talked about how America doesn’t actually have a problem with tits, it’s the nipples that cause a ruckus. She also declared herself a “vegan nudist”, which make me wonder, are there colonies for vegan nudists? *Puts ‘visit vegan nudist colonies’ on to-do list*

Cyrus has slowly worn down my defenses. I’ve come to accept her as not too bad. Not as bad as Taylor Swift. There’s something sinister about Swift that I can’t quite finger. But I wish I could. Finger. What I’m thinking.