Bloomingdale’s Confirmed as Second Horseman of Christmas Apocalypse

Does Bloomingdale’s new ad endorse date raping your friends?

Is that just your yule log or are you happy to see me?

Ok, but let’s get real. Sexual violence is no laughing matter. And even hinting at sexual assault as a branding tactic to sell s**t is pretty much as low as you can get. This is the equivalent of having a solid minute of every Law and Order: SVU episode, brought to you by Goldfish, being dedicated to how much the killer loves The Snack That Smiles Back! Goldfish!™

Smh @ Bloomingdale’s.

After the Starbucks red solo cup fiasco left the religious right wanting to roast their chestnuts over an open fire (confirming their spot as first horseman of the Christmas apocalypse), Bloomingdale’s is riding just as hard as their dark corporate brethren with this pretty gross and rapey advert.

You like your eggnog thick? How about Robin Thicke?

Bloomingdale’s has apologized for the blurred lines in their recent advertising screw up. And they should. They nasty. The company recently told Tech Insider:

“In reflection of recent feedback, the copy we used in our recent catalog was inappropriate and in poor taste. Bloomingdale’s sincerely apologizes for this error in judgment.”

Their apology doesn’t change the fact that seeing this ad made me feel like how Charlie felt in Always Sunny when he realized his mom used to nail dozens of men dressed up as Santa Claus every year, but ok. Thanks, I guess.