Amy Schumer Posts Bikini-Clad Instagram Photo Throwing Shade at Taylor Swift

Did Amy Schumer just join the ranks of celebrities who waste their time throwing shade at Taylor Swift? This is Taylor Swift we’re talking about. You know, the greatest PR narcissistic queen of our generation. Let’s get it out there, I don’t f**k with Taylor Swift. Everything about her carefully contrived persona drives me to rant to the only one of my friends that seems to understand my unprovoked unadulterated hatred for people I don’t know. But I fucking respect her.

I’m nobody and it’s still a waste of my time. We know one thing for sure. Anything said about Taylor Swift anywhere just makes her more famous. She’s the poster child for ‘all press is good press.’ Amy Schumer decided to ignore this simple fact of life and continued Swift media saturation by taking to Instagram during the Grammys in hope to get herself a headline or two in the process.

The post in question highlights the vastly different body types present in the human species. On one hand, there’s Taylor, the Amazonian with legs for days and not a place on her body for fat to stick. On the other, we have Amy, a shorter, stouter but no less sexy version of a woman. Taylor is no stranger to showing off her body and she shouldn’t be as long as that’s the way she wants to dress.

Amy looks great. Taylor looks great. You both piss me the f**k off.

But let’s slow the train down for a second. If your thighs aren’t touching at any given time, the space in between them is a thigh gap. We all have them and no one actually cares about your thighs until they’re vice gripping a face into position.