Jane Goodall Says Donald Trump Acts Like a Chimpanzee

Want some ice for that burn?

Famous anthropologist Jane Goodall had some real interesting s**t to say to The Atlantic about everyone’s least favorite fascist, cheeto-looking alleged child rapist.

‘In many ways the performances of Donald Trump remind me of male chimpanzees and their dominance rituals.’

Yeah, I also get the feeling he’s just pulling on his dick every time he opens his mouth.

‘In order to impress rivals, males seeking to rise in the dominance hierarchy perform spectacular displays: stamping, slapping the ground, dragging branches, throwing rocks.”

It’s good to know that a percentage of the American populace is on a level of stupid so profound that the s**t chimpanzees do is all it takes to impress them.

‘The more vigorous and imaginative the display, the faster the individual is likely to rise in the hierarchy, and the longer he is likely to maintain that position.”

Why can’t we just send Trump to where they communicate on a level he can understand? Some kinda chimpanzee island. Or hell.

Thanks for confirming what we all already knew, Jane Goodall.