Drake Gets His Dick Wet with Bria Vinaite

It’s been a month or so since Drake has been in the news for dating, so it’s about time he dusts off his dick and gets it wet again.

His current target is actress Bria Vinaite, a relative unknown who made a big impression at the Toronto International Film Festival.

According to reports, Drake and Vianaite went to dinner together. A witness said, “It definitely looked like a date, and they left the restaurant at 2:30 a.m. hand in hand.”

So, who is Bria Vinaite? Well, she’s a former Instagram model/marijuana enthusiast turned actress/marijuana enthusiast. She was discovered by director Sean Baker. He asked her to read for a role in his film The Florida Project. She ended up getting the part despite no acting experience. The Florida Project is a film about residents of rundown motels on the outskirts of Orlando. Vinaite plays a struggling mother whose child won’t shut the hell up about wanting to go to Disney World.

The film reportedly received a 10-minute standing ovation at Cannes, but I feel like every film gets a standing ovation at Cannes. If anything, we should be talking about how the film only got a 10-minute standing ovation when everyone knows that any standing ovation less than 20 minutes means your movie sucked.

If Drake’s review means anything (it doesn’t) then The Florida Project is the best film you’ll see all year.

Ummm, I’m pretty sure I re-watched White Men Can’t Jump this year and there’s no way it’s better than that.

I hope Bria doesn’t get too comfortable as Drake’s main squeeze. He’s a man that moves on faster than a Star Wars director. He’s just a lonely man right now because Jennifer Lopez and Alex Rodriguez are doing well, Serena Williams just had a baby, Doris Burke is preparing for the NBA season, and Rihanna still won’t return his texts.