Company’s Dildo App Secretly Recorded Sex Sounds, Users Should Go Back to Battery-Operated Toys

Sex toys have gotten too advanced over the years. There used to be a time when you’d just buy the toy, charge it or replace the batteries, and be satisfied with your purchase. Now, you buy the toy, have to register it through the website, download the app, buy a separate charger, get pissed off when it doesn’t connect with your phone, and by the time you’ve done all that you no longer want to use it.

There’s a sex toy made by Lovense that you can control with your phone. It’s not like the toy is in your hand and only takes a press of the button to control. You definitely need your phone to help you out. On top of being able to control the toy with your phone, you can also record yourself having sex.

That’s not part of the features listed, and the company is calling it “a minor bug,” which is just poor marketing. There are no such things as bugs. According to Apple law, everything is a feature.

According to a Reddit user, the app recorded a six-minute audio file of sex sounds. I guess his phone didn’t have the space to record a longer file. Lovense said that it was just a local file and didn’t go to the company’s servers. So, if someone wanted to hack Lovense, they would not find a file of this Reddit user moaning.

This sounds like a big deal, but I’m pretty indifferent towards it. There are apps out there that record your sex sounds and help you improve your sex life with those recordings. Again, Lovense could have marketed this the same way. I also don’t have any sympathy towards people buying these new-age toys and wanting to use their phone to control them.

Buy (or steal) a battery-operated toy like a normal person.