Lindsay Lohan was in search for the perfect actor to play Richard Burton opposite her Elizabeth Taylor. She wanted an A-lister and to fly to London to find her Dick. Everyone knew that wasn’t going to happen so the studio patted her on the head and picked one for her instead. They ended up choosing Australian actor Grant Bowler (True Blood). The deal was sealed after he read with Lohan at the network. “The chemistry erupted in the room, said executive producer Larry A. Thompson.

The casting comes only 10 days before Liz & Dick is scheduled to begin filming — on June 4 — after the movie’s executive producer Larry A. Thompson and Lifetime had auditioned “many actors on just about any continent,” Thompson said. He noted that the hope was to try and find an actor who, like Burton, is Welsh, but New Zealander Bowler wowed them with his tape. “Grant will add gravitas to our couple and bring to life one of the greatest actors who has ever lived,” Thompson said. “Burton was a Welsh poet, a rascal, and a man’s man, who swept Elizabeth Taylor off her feet and flew her so close to the sun that they both exploded into stardust that still lights up Hollywood.”

Wow. That description of Liz and Dick’s relationship started off really manly then got really gay at the end. Not unlike every one of John Travolta’s massages.