Adam Lambert and Finnish boyfriend Sauli Koskinen were arrested last night outside of popular Helsinki gay bar DTM (Don’t Tell Mama). Not surprisingly, that bar is one letter away from ATM.

Reports say the two were kicked out of DTM following a fight in one of the backrooms which carried on outside. Finnish beauty queen Sofia Ruusila, who had been celebrating with them, tried to break it up but Adam hit her on accident. Adam and Sauli were held for questioning on four possible assault charges.

Investigator Juvonen has completed his interrogation and the two were released on Thursday afternoon. Koskinen later blogged about the incident, writing in Finnish (as translated by Google): “Celebrities are people too and fame is not easy. Love is not always easy either, but it’s forever.” Koskinen goes on to say that the “hangover is gone already” and “Paparazzi, police stations have back doors, too, go away already.” The Hollywood Reporter

Based on my awesome stereotyping, I wonder why these two were arrested in the first place. High pitched whining, finger snapping, head shaking and kitten slaps can hardly be considered dangerous.

Lady Gaga had a surprise 25th birthday party at La Cita in LA on Sunday. One soon to be blacklisted from every celebrity event attendee was American Idol alum Adam Lambert who came as a guest of the Scissor Sisters and became the sloppiest of drunks.

Adam had his own little pre-party and showed up drunk. Perez Hilton (eaarrgh) told the Morning Dish radio show that he was “super sloppy embarrassingly drunk!” I feel that needs triple exclamation points since it’s coming from Perez. Lambert ended up punching a hole in the ceiling, smearing cake in Gaga’s face and shoving a doll in her mouth. I don’t think he succeeded on the last two.

Lambert began some intense fist-pumping and kept beating on the walls until he’d actually punched a hole in the building’s low ceiling, Hilton said.

And another eyewitness tells UsMagazine.com, “Adam acted like an animal. He kept jumping up on the tables and chairs and screaming. When they brought the cake out he tried to smear it in Gaga’s face and put a doll from the cake in her mouth!”

Then the “Whataya Want from Me” singer tried to serenade the birthday girl, “like he was auditioning for Idol again!” Hilton said.

Eventually Gaga asked her security to kick him out, added the witness.

A rep for Lambert had no comment on the incident, but a few days later, Lambert acknowledged his bad behavior on his Twitter page.

“My hand still hurts. LoL,” he wrote Wednesday. “Was trying for celebratory gesture 4 gaga’s B- piñata style…instead my fist is all bruised and la cita has a hole in the ceiling. #sloppy.”

Sounds like a good time. For Adam Lambert. Gaga, not so much. If I was her, I’d have punched him in the face and shoved a used tampon in his mouth. Then I would have put on a tiara and twirled around the room like a princess. Like I’m doing right now.

The Miami Beach Police Department is investigating an alleged assault on a paparazzo by American Idol runner-up Adam Lambert.

In photos taken, Lambert is shown grappling with the photog and grabbing at his backpack. According to the police report, Adam grabbed his backpack “where the camera was placed” and “wrestled [the photog] to the ground forcefully.” The photog didn’t have any “bruises or lacerations.” The State’s Attorney will now decided whether or not to prosecute.

After the incident, Adam went on Twitter and pecked out, “I lost my temper for a sec but wow it felt great lol MIAMI!!!” Adam also wrote, “Eeew paparazzi killed my peaceful afternoon on the beach!” and “They’re real good at provoking, but there ain’t any pics or video of the b.s. they spew out… Haha well… I (cont) Hahha the photos are hilarious !! Lol please everyone forgive me for that hat. – I was attempting a disguise- clearly failed. Hahah.”

So the photog got beat down by a flamboyant gay dude and it didn’t even look like a beat down. It looked more like surprise butt sex. I hope the cops sat there and laughed at his dumb ass for 30 minutes before they took his statement and threw it in the trash.

The backlash from Adam Lambert’s performance at the American Music Awards continues. ABC, who previously canceled his performance on Good Morning America, has also canceled two more of Lambert’s performances which include those on Jimmy Kimmel Live and Dick Clark’s New Year’s Rockin’ Eve. Apparently, they’re still worried that Adam is going to pull a similar stunt like he did during the AMAs. Lambert is pretty much blacklisted at this point.

He wrote on his Twitter: “Yes, sadly friends, ABC has cancelled my appearances on Kimmel and NYE. :( don’t blame them. It’s the FCC heat.” Although, he added he’ll still be on Leno and that “It’ll all blow over. Let’s focus on being positive! :)”

ABC hasn’t commented yet, but on Monday, Anne Sweeney, co-chairwoman of Disney Media Networks and president of the Disney-ABC Television Group said the network was re-evaluating its approach to live shows and wanted to find a way to make sure the live performances resemble rehearsals.

People are idiots. Just turn off the TV when this weirdo comes on. “But think of the children,” they’ll say oblivious to the fact that their kids are already straight edge freaks dressed in skinny jeans making out with boys just like their idol Pete Wentz. For Lambert’s next live act, he should just have an orgy with a bunch of dudes on stage. Not sure what that’ll prove, but it should piss someone off. And isn’t that the point of music? To be controversial. That Lady Gaga will be so jealous.

Adam Lambert’s performance on Good Morning America has been canceled as a direct result of Sunday’s American Music Awards appearance where he displeased middle America. GMA is afraid his performance may be an encore of Sunday’s with more stuffing of faces into crotches.

In a statement, an ABC spokeswoman said, “Given his controversial American Music Awards performance, we were concerned about airing a similar concert so early in the morning.”

The GMA performance was scheduled for tomorrow. Now, the rep for Lambert, 27, confirms he will instead be on The Early Show on CBS.

There are way more controversial and mind-raping things out there at 9 in the morning other than an Adam Lambert performance. A few of which include leaked pictures of CBS news anchor Katie Couric drunk and shaking her ass, PETA’s Thanksgiving ad and this dog trying to eat a baby squirrel. On a list of “things that offend me”, Adam Lambert ranks somewhere between a dirty table and non-matching socks.

Adama Lambert’s performance at the AMAs yesterday which saw Lambert simulate fellatio with a male dancer, drag a woman across the ground, make out with a male keyboardist and grab his crotch and flip off the crowd left a  bitter taste in the mouths of a few. These few, of course, have a lot of free time on their hands because they lodged complaints. “Think of the children,” they probably shouted at operators who didn’t have the heart to tell them they called the wrong number.

Lambert, however, isn’t apologizing. In fact, he’s a little outraged they edited his performance on the west coast feed. He told Access Hollywood,

“You know honestly, if I offended some people… it’s apples and oranges. I’m not an artist that does things for every single person,” he told Access Hollywood. “I believe in artistic freedom and expression, I believe in honoring the lyrics of a song, and those lyrics aren’t really for everybody either.”

He also said he considered editing his performance “discrimination.”

“There’s a big double standard, female pop artists have been doing things provocative like that for years, and the fact that I’m a male, and I’ll be edited and discriminated against could be a problem,” he explained.

Added Lambert, “People are scared and it’s really sad, I just wish people could open their minds up and enjoy things, it’s all for a laugh, it’s really not that big of a deal.”

I’m mad too. Not by what he did, but by people wasting their time complaining about this. His performance must have been so offensive that it left them in a catatonic state because they couldn’t make it to the remote to turn it off. Jesus, it’s like someone forced them to watch a snuff film.

When Adam Lambert first started his performance at the American Music Awards, I thought they were trying to downplay his gayness again by having him drag a woman around like a caveman. I was totally proven wrong at the 1:10 mark. The cameraman must have had a heart attack when that happened.

As for the backup dancer, he probably would have never thought he’d be stuffing his face in Adam Lambert’s crotch when he first got into the business. That must have been a little piece of heaven right there. I can’t imagine the conversation between the dancer and the choreographer. Dancer: “You want me to pretend to give Adam Lambert a blowjob? And this will be live on stage, publicly broadcast to all of America and will most likely wind up on YouTube?” Choreographer: “Look, do you want to be a fucking backup dancer or not?!”

Adam Lambert is openly gay and flamboyantly so. You’d think because of this his handlers would have no problem putting him on the cover of Out magazine. You’d be wrong of course. They had to put Adam in a group shot with women to balance out the gayness. According to Out, his people don’t want him to appear too gay or gay-gay. In a letter from the editor-in-chief Aaron Hicklin featured in the new issue, he writes:

“We’re curious whether you know that we made cover offers for you before American Idol was even halfway through its run. Apparently, Out was too gay, even for you. There was the issue of what it would do to your record sales, we were told,” Hicklin wrote. “Imagine! A gay musician on the cover of a gay magazine. What might the parents think! It’s only because this cover is a group shot that includes a straight woman that your team would allow you to be photographed at all.”

The guy who interviewed Lambert, Shana Naomi Krockmal, added:

“I briefly met Adam, and then the publicist and I walked out to the balcony, at which point I was cautioned against making the interview ‘too gay,’ or, ‘you know, gay-gay.’”

Krockmal went on to point out that Adam is an openly gay man and “that in addition to being able to sing his face off (his words), he is defiantly, outrageously campy and queer—and that he seems to have such a sense of humor about it, and a willingness to shake things up.”

Adam fired back on Twitter:

“Dear Aaron, it’s def not that deep. Chill! Guess ya gotta get attention for the magazine. U too are at the mercy of the marketing machine… Until we have a meaningful conversation, perhaps you should refrain from projecting your publications’ agenda onto my career.”

When you think of Adam Lambert, you think of drag queens riding atop pink unicorns in leather chaps with tassels carrying dildos as their lances and dressed in sequined dresses that reflect so much light that even angels would be put to shame. What I’m trying to say is if his people don’t want him to appear “too gay” or “gay-gay” then they’re a little too late.

Details is clearly for the gays. The operate under the pretense that they’re for the metros, but they’re fooling no one. It’s ironic because they have Adam Lambert on the cover this month. They try to de-gay it by having him kissing and fondling a naked woman’s body. They even add a few testosterone fueled anecdotes like:

“There was one woman in Jersey who was actually gorgeous,” says Lambert. “She had obviously had a couple of cocktails, and during an after–show meet–and–greet, she just slithered up next to me and started kissing my neck. I was cool with it. But then it started to get a little weird because she was, like, moaning. She gave me a note that said, ‘I want to make out with you, here’s my number,’ and I was like, wow, this is crazy. But again, it’s cool. Because yeah, I am gay, but I like kissing women sometimes. Women are pretty. It doesn’t mean I’m necessarily sleeping with them.

None of this convinces anybody, of course. They should just call this magazine “Don’t Tell My Parents I’m Gay.”

People kept on telling me Adam Lambert is gay, but I didn’t see it. I thought he just had really dark eyelashes and an eclectic fashion sense. It seems I was mistaken. Adam is gay and he even comes out in the upcoming issue of Rolling Stone.

Lambert says, “I don’t think it should be a surprise for anyone to hear that I’m gay.” Well, it is to me, Adam! It is to me!

Wondering why he waited all this time? Because he thought coming out in Rolling Stone would be “cool”.

“Right after the finale, I almost started talking about it to the reporters, but I thought, ‘I’m going to wait for Rolling Stone, that will be cooler,’ ” he tells us. “I didn’t want the Clay Aiken thing and the celebrity-magazine bullshit. I need to be able to explain myself in context.

Oh my, what a shocking revelation. I had to sit down and fan myself with a magazine after reading this. Next you’ll be telling me fire is hot, ice is cold and Brooke Hogan has a scrotum.

You may want to hold on to your hats for this one. Maybe even take a seat. I have something unbelievable to tell you. Are you ready for this? Adam Lambert might be gay. Shocking!

Proof of this wild accusation? Lambert was photographed yesterday leaving Guys & Dolls in West Hollywood holding hands with a male friend. Lambert is also slated to “come out” in an upcoming issue of Rolling Stone. “Come out” is in quotes because when you already have pictures like the header and this, there’s not much more out you can get. Anymore out and he’d be 50 miles from the closet with a flaming leopard man purse slung over his shoulder walking away like Lou Ferrigno in the closing credits of The Incredible Hulk.

[Image: Splash News]

A week ago, Clay Aiken said Adam Lambert sucks claiming his performance made his ears bleed. A day later, Aiken sort of apologized, but mostly gloated about becoming relevant again.

Lambert finally responded, telling Access Hollywood, “I don’t know Clay. I’m glad he’s getting headlines now though, because he wasn’t before. If he wants to ride my coattails about it, good for him.”

Oh, snap. Clay just got served. What will keyboard warrior Clay type next in his pay to access blog? I imagine he’s going to go all Kanye West on Adam. I can already hear him engaging his caps lock. Adam better watch out. Clay has been known to type up to 100 words per minute when he’s riled up. Expect his “look how popular I still am” response soon.

A little over a week ago, it was rumored that Clay Aiken was intent on doing a duet with the American Idol star that stole his gay thunder, Adam Lambert. He even showed up unannounced backstage. That did not go over so well because AI despises Clay Aiken. He was the first contestant to dump 19 Entertainment, Idol‘s management company that handles everything, and it’s assumed that he talked Kelly Clarkson into dumping them as well. Suffice to say, he was shuffled off the set as fast as you would that uncle you hate and any hopes of a duet with Lambert were dashed.

Now Aiken is bitter. On his site that he charges people $29.95 a year to read, a fan asked “what did you think about the show?” Clay’s bitchy response after the jump (via Gawker).

Now that it’s all over, and for the record…. I couldn’t be happier about the way AI ended this year. I only turn the show on once a season, and only to see what the set looks like each year. This year, I happened to turn it during the minute that Adam Lambert was singing “Ring of Fire” and, at that moment, thought my ears would bleed. Contrived, awful, and slightly frightening! I wasn’t really a fan and found myself surprised whenever folks told me that they liked him. Granted, I never saw another performance (and many folks who I trust said that he was great) but I can’t imagine I would have enjoyed it. Just not my cup of tea at all. To each his own. I never saw Kris sing on the show, but whether he was good or not is really relative. It’s usually a matter of taste, right? But Idol is not always a matter of musical taste only. It’s about the person you like. From what little I saw, Kris seemed likable. (That’s not to say that Adam isn’t just as likable as anyone.. maybe more so… I don’t know) When Ruben and I were standing next to each other every night (many years ago) you had two equally talented, equally unlikely, equally unpolished contestants…. so it really was a matter of taste as to who was voted for. While some may argue that one of us was hyped more than the other, I don’t feel that was the case. However, this year, there was an obvious bias. Not even having watched the show, I can tell you that I was WELL aware of the bias from the judges as to who should win. In my opinion, that is awfully unattractive. I don’t think I am alone

In my opinion, it all often comes down to that last night of voting. Until the finale, folks are voting for the contestant that they want to see continue. But, I believe that on that last night, the dynamic changes. No longer forced to choose one person that they want to see win, the audience can effectively vote AGAINST the person that they don’t want to see win. In the case of season two this might have happened. There may have been some folks who voted for myself or Ruben because they didn’t like the other of us. I was the nerdy little girly boy who some didn’t want to see win, so they may have voted for Ruben. I don’t know. .. But again, I feel that Ruben and I were fairly matched. We both had our detractors and negatives, but I feel we were both very worthy of being on that stage in that moment, and either of us would have been worthy of winning. The show was different then, and folks made it in seasons 1-3 because they were “real” people who happened to sing/entertain well. But, somewhere along the way, AI stopped being about real people.

It didn’t stop there. Clay also gave his thoughts on why Kris Allen won.

In a battle between David and Goliath, my money is on David!

I think many voters got sick of being “told who to vote for”. I think many were turned off by the blatant favoritism shown towards one contestant. Therefore, on that last night, they used their votes against a contestant that they were tired of hearing about and for the contestant who had been written off. And, at the same time, I think they voted AGAINST an American Idol that has, for four years now, been more about the slick productions and polished contestants than it has been about finding the raw talent that it did in its first three seasons.

Those votes for Kris were also votes to return the show to its roots of finding “real” contestants with undiscovered talent and giving them the chance to grow and shine. They were votes that said “we’re tired of seeing contestants who already seem to know it all”.

Will American Idol choose to listen to the resounding and clarion call that those voters gave them?…. “Enough with the pretention. More Rubens, more Clays, more Fantasias and Tamyras and Kellys please.” My faith has always been in the voters. I think they have gotten it right every year (mine included). It’s now up to American Idol to decide if it will finally REALLY listen to the folks that keep it on the air.

Jesus. You could hear him stomping around his room, tearing his Adam Lambert posters off the wall and wiping off his Adam Lambert mascara during that rant.