Nicole Kidman was seen recently with what seems to be either a baby bump or early signs of obesity after coming out of her yoga class. There could probably be a lot of explanations for this like…I don’t know…drinking that water she’s carrying.

But if she was pregnant, it would start getting interesting. It could prove that Nicole Kidman might not have been the problem and Tom Cruise is actually sterile and he stole someone’s semen to inject Katie Holmes with. It could also mean, Tom Cruise might actually be gay and never had sex with Kidman but needed the people to think he was straight so he impregnated Katie Holmes with a vial of one of his Scientology brother’s sperm. Either way, Tom Cruise finally lost it and there’s no getting it back.

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Jack Black now has a son. Another addition to the season of celebrity babies. I guess you’re not cool unless you give birth to something.

I’m already having headaches and am going, “Where is he going to pre-school? Am I going to put cameras in every room of my house to spy on babysitters to make sure they don’t shake the baby?”

I would be more worried about Jack Black shaking the baby after an impromptu baby verse alligator wrestling match because he lost. He’s the kind of dad that would teach the baby that white is blue and north is west.

Jack Black goes on to say he won’t let his son listen to Tenacious D. anytime soon, but he did not mention anything about watching The Neverending Story III, which may be worse. Jack Black has been testing my patience with his “comedy” lately so watch out Nacho Libre.

Jack Black at the premiere of Nacho Libre.

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