For those of you who managed to watch the 7 minute Dark Knight Rises prologue and were left wondering what the hell Bane was mumbling, you’re not alone. Was he ordering a #1 combo from McDonalds or was he making a badass speech. One could make a case for both. Well, commenter DHS2020 posted a transcript of the entire prologue. I put this in the other post but here it is in case you missed it. I suggest you act the scenes out like I did with my stuffed animals. Just don’t let your roommate catch you because you’ll never hear the end of it.

Jim Gordon: I knew Harvey Dent. I was his friend. And it will be a very long time before some one inspires us like he did. I believed in Harvey Dent. . . . .
[Plane outside in the middle of nowhere]
CIA: Dr. Pavel, I’m with the CIA.
Militia: He wasn’t alone.
CIA: You don’t get to bring friends.
Dr. Pavel: They’re not my friends.
Militia: Don’t worry, I’ll vouch for them.
CIA: And why would I want them?
Militia: They were trying to grab your prize. They work for the mercenary. The masked man..
CIA: Bane??! …… Get them on board, I’ll call it in
[INSIDE PLANE]
CIA: The flight plan I just filed with the agency list me, my men, Dr. Pavel here. But only one of you!
[PLANE DOOR OPENS]
CIA: First one to talk gets to stay on the aircraft!!!
CIA: Who paid you to grab Dr. Pavel? [No answer, gun fire past head out open door] He didn’t fly so well! [Pulls guy back in to plane] Who wants to try next? Tell me about Bane!! Why does he wear the mask!?! A lot of loyalty for a hired gun!!
BANE: [Still has black hood on] Perhaps he’s wondering why someone would shoot a man before throwing him out of a plane.
CIA: At least you can talk. Who are you?
BANE: It doesn’t matter who we are, what matters is our plan.
[CIA SLOWLY TAKES OFF HOOD]
BANE: No one cared who I was until I put on the mask.
CIA: If I pull that off would you die.
BANE: It would be extreamly painful….
CIA: You’re a big guy!
BANE: For you!
CIA: Was getting caught part of your plan?
BANE: Of course….. Dr. Pavel refused our offer in favor of yours, we had to find out what he told you about us.
Dr. Pavel: Nothing! I said nothing!!!
CIA: Well congratulations! You got yourself caught!
CIA Operative: Sir!
CIA: Now whats the next STEP in your master plane?!
BANE: Crashing this plane!……..With no survivors!
[FIGHTING ON PLANE, OUTSIDE MERCENARIES ARE SHOOTING IN TO THE CABIN, BANE PUNCH’S CIA IN THE FACE AND KNOCKS HIM OUT. HOOK SMALL PLANE UP TO THE CARGO PLANE AND BEGIN TO PULL IT VERTICAL. BLOW THE TAIL OFF OF THE NOW VERTICAL PLANE. TWO MERCENARIES COME IN WITH A BODY BAG, OPEN BODY BAG AND PULL OUT BLOOD TRANSFUSION TUBING AND BANE GRABS DR. PAVEL AND HOLDS HIM WITH ONE ARM WHILE HE INSERTS THE NEEDLE IN HIS ARM. BLOOD FLOWS IN TO THE BODY IN THE BODY BAG WHILE A MAN PUMPS THE DEAD MANS HEART AND PAVEL IS STRUGGLING. BANE HOOKS THE DR UP TO A HARNESS, ONE OF THE MEN THAT WAS BROUGHT ON THE PLANE WITH BANE BEGINS TO HOOK UP TO ANOTHER HARNESS.]
BANE: NO (Puts his arm on man’s shoulder) They expect one of us in the wreckage brother!
FOLLOWER: We started a fire?
BANE: The fire rises!
[DR. PAVEL IS SCREAMING]
BANE: Calm down Doctor. Now’s not the time for fear. That comes later!!!
[BANE PRESSES DOWN ON A TRIGGER SWITCH AND THE PLANE FALLS FROM AROUND THEM AND THEY ARE BEING PULLED BY THE CARGO PLANE.]

Christian Bale is done with the Batman franchise. He and Nolan wrapped filming a few days ago which marked the end of Batman.

“I wrapped a few days ago so that will be the last time I’m taking that [Batman hood] off,” The Dark Knight Rises star tells the Philippine Daily Inquirer. “I believe that the whole production wrapped yesterday, so it’s all done. Everything’s finished. It’s me and [director Christopher Nolan] — that will be the end of that Batman era.” Us Magazine

This is bad news for everyone who loves continuity because you know they’re going to want to extend this series for another three movies when they see how much it makes on opening weekend. Batman 4 will probably be titled Batman vs the Pale, Brooding Vampires and Maybe Werewolves If They’re Still Popular.

A teaser poster for Dark Knight Rises was released by Warner Bros. yesterday while the teaser trailer will be released on Friday in front of Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows.

The image shows buildings forming the shape of the Batman signal crumbling. Why is it crumbling? I don’t know. Maybe it was from a natural disaster. Maybe it’s an allusion to the big earthquake in Japan and how Batman could have saved them. Oh, real classy, guys.

Here are the first shots of Tom Hardy as Bane in The Dark Knight Rises which was discovered through some viral marketing treasure hunt. As far as first pictures go, he looks decent.

I’m more impressed by how marketing for the new Batman movie tricked people into doing work to find a picture. Never underestimate how hard people will work for free stuff. The marketing department must be laughing their asses off right now.

Anne Hathaway has been cast as Catwoman aka Selina Kyle in The Dark Knight Rises. In a statement issued by Warner Bros., Nolan said, “I am thrilled to have the oppurtunity to work with Anne Hathaway, who will be a fantastic addition to our ensemble as we complete our story.

In a case of Hollywood nepotism, Tom Hardy will also join the cast as Bane. Nolan said, “I am delighted to be working with Tom again and excited to watch him bring to life our new interpretation of one of Batman’s most formidable enemies.”

If you don’t know who Bane is, he’s the guy who breaks Batman’s back leaving him a paraplegic. In another interview, Christian Bale said Dark Knight Rises will probably be his and Nolan’s last Batman film. Unless Nolan sees another story, then they’ll be back. So basically it was a non-statement. But it does open the door for Bane breaking Batman and making the movie awesome however unlikely that is.

According to Christopher Nolan’s cinematographer Wally Pfister, there will be no headache inducing 3-D in the next Batman movie because he Nolan and Pfister both hate it. Even better news, the next film could be shot entirely in IMAX. Pfister says:

“I must say I’m a huge IMAX fan. I like IMAX more than I like 3-D,” he explained. “Chris’ films are so densely layered and have so much going on visually in every way that IMAX helps enhance that because of the scope and the scale of it — it becomes a much larger canvas to paint on. That’s what we found on ‘Dark Knight.’

“I’m not a big fan of 3-D,” he continued. “I liken it to my View-Master I had 40 years ago. Are you really getting more out of the story with 3-D? When you separate those different planes and you’re creating artificial depth, it looks phony to me.”

Nolan hasn’t jumped on the 3-D bandwagon either, saying in June, “I’m not a huge fan of 3-D.” Still, any decisions about how to shoot “Batman 3″ will ultimately involve Warner Bros. and will certainly wait until Nolan and Pfister sit down and have a discussion similar to the one they had in the run-up to “Inception.”

Thanks to Avatar, there’s a big push for every studio to have their movie in 3-D now. Studios are like little kids jumping up and down thinking 3-D will be their savior. Plus, they get to add an additional $6 to each movie ticket. I imagine at the studio meetings all the execs will ask Nolan if he could have a fist, a bat fist if you will, punching through the screen in 3-D. The appropriate response to that is “no,” followed by a swift kick to the nuts.

While everyone else knows nothing about the next Batman movie, The Sun is sitting in their high chair laughing at those peons chasing their tails. You see, they are in the know and are well aware of exactly who’s going to be in it. Are you ready for the big news? Hold on to your mind because it’s about to be blown.

The Beverly Hills Cop star, 47, has been signed up by British director CHRISTOPHER NOLAN to reprise the role played by JIM CARREY in 1995’s Batman Forever.

Execs have also signed up rising Transformers star SHIA LABEOUF, 22, to play Robin.

Meanwhile, Brit RACHEL WEISZ is said to be up for the Catwoman role.

Congratulations, The Sun. You are the winner. It only makes sense that Shia LaBeouf will play Robin since he recently played Harrison Ford’s sidekick in Indiana Jones. And of course Eddie Murphy will play The Riddler since he, um, loves wearing costumes? As long as we’re throwing names around, how about have William H. Macy play The Penguin and Jennifer Aniston play Batgirl? It makes just as much sense as the Eddie Murphy and Shia LaBeouf thing.

Rabid fans dedicated enough to jump through hoops for the Batman viral marketing campaign were treated to a preview of the new Dark Knight trailer. A select few were even given 35mm prints to take home. Alas, these prints were defaced by that d-bag Joker who renamed the film The Dork Knight. Awesome! Although, one has to wonder. How long did it take the Joker to graffiti all these cells on the reel? Why does the Joker have so much free time? Wouldn’t it be better to use this time to concoct an ingenious plan to kill the Batman? Maybe the Joker did it the new school way after discovering Final Cut Pro on his Mac? I’m just surprised the Joker hasn’t caught up with the times. Had he been the master prankster he makes himself out to be he would have Rickrolled everyone.

If you didn’t catch the 6 minute Batman prologue running in front of the IMAX version of I Am Legend, then here it is. Download here. First impressions? There seems to be a giant head looming on the bottom left throughout the movie. I for one am excited to find out what character this head belongs too. Is it the giant baby? I’m a little hazy on my Batman history, but the giant baby was probably one of his greatest foes right after Alfred who kept shrinking his bat suit after every wash. In Alfred’s defense, Batman’s love of jelly donuts wasn’t helping either. Official (shorter) trailer here.

Whoever filmed the Batman trailer in the movie theater, you’re awesome, but next time get a better camera. For those who don’t know, a 6 or 7 minute prologue of Batman will be shown in front of Will Smith’s I Am Legend on IMAX. Someone get a camera in there stat because there’s no way I’m paying $15 to see an IMAX movie.

A special effects technician was killed doing a dummy run involving the Batmobile when his 4×4 crashed into a tree on the set of Batman: The Dark Knight. This depressing news confirms that, sadly, my mother was right when she told me being a special effects technician is a dangerous job and to just stick with things I know like picking up other people’s trash and whining. Thanks mom.