Deadline Hollywood reports that the curiously anticipated Gossip Girl spinoff is dead in the water. Next Monday’s episode of Gossip Girl is a flashback to the teen years of Lily van der Woodsen (Brittany Snow) which was to drum up interest in the new series set in the 80′s. However, interest in the show rapidly declined, dropping from high to, meh, to no one wants to watch this crap. Now poor Brittany Snow has to find another job or turn to prostitution like my many letters have suggested.

Coachella is a three day music festival held in the desert so it’s understandable why you won’t find me there because I could barely stand the 94 degree heat at my place on Sunday. Who you will find there, however, are celebrities like Brittany Snow because they can afford $5 blended mochas and Gatorades every half hour during the day and a personal heater at night. If I had been there yesterday, you would have seen me wrapping a  t-shirt around my head and crawling on the ground like I had already been stranded in the desert for 3 days.

Anorexia has become an increasingly common issue among young women in Hollywood as well as regular folk. In the latest issue of CosmoGIRL!, Brittany Snow reveals that she too suffered from it and credits best friend Sophia Bush for helping her beat a nine year battle with the disorder.

“Sophia gives really, really good advice,” Snow, 22, reveals in the May issue of CosmoGIRL!. “I was going through a difficult time, and she was going through a difficult time figuring out the whole Chad [Michael Murray split] thing.

“We had so many slumber parties where she held my hand [as we worked] through a lot of different things,” Snow goes on. “When somebody can be there through something like that, they’re a friend forever.”

Brittany and Sophia had “so many slumber parties” where they “worked through a lot of different things.”So, does that mean they, like, made out? With tongue? And did they strip naked and pillow fight while feathers rained down around them? And did they finish the evening by going down on each other? Because clinical psychologists agree that this is a great way to battle anorexia. Rawr. I didn’t know eating disorders could sound this erotic. Usually when people talk to me about anorexia, it’s about how they took a dump in a plastic container and weighed it.