When you’ve fallen from grace like Lindsay Lohan, the best way to get back on top is to have some guy grab your boob and make-out with you. Take note, ladies.

[Lindsay Lohan on the set of Labor Pains. Image via Splash News]

Britney Spears’ comeback encountered a minor setback today as the cameo she filmed for the upcoming Pussycat Dolls video, When I Grow Up, has been edited out. No reason was given and the PCD during a filming of FNMTV did not elaborate.

Dejected, I asked my own source why Britney’s scene was cut. They said, “She ate it.” “You mean she fell?,” I wondered. “No, she ate it. Literally. She ate the reel of film.” Wow, homeless people. Is there anything they DON’T know?

Lindsay Lohan hopes to turn her life around with her new movie, Labor Pains, about a young woman (Lindsay) who pretends to be pregnant so she doesn’t get fired. Now Lindsay is one step closer to realizing her dream as she has found someone to insure, albeit with a lot of vouching from the film’s producer, Rick Schwartz. Rush & Molloy call the script hilarious and exclaim that this could bring Lindsay’s career back on track.

According to the screenplay we’ve obtained, Lohan plays a young woman who pretends to be pregnant so she doesn’t get fired. She thrives on the attention she’s getting despite “carrying a volleyball around on her stomach.” We don’t want to be spoilers, but the script is hilarious.

The movie will be made whether or not there’s an actors strike, since the union gave Schwartz a waiver, Variety reported.

Lindsay was never that great of an actress. She’s not some fallen star who has a chance at a great comeback. The one decent movie she was in was Mean Girls and that movie sucked. After that, it was all downhill. Herbie, I Know Who Killed Me, Georgia Rules. Lindsay’s body of work belongs more in sadomasochistic rituals than in AFI’s top 100.

Don’t even ask me what she’s doing with Dennis Hopper either. I have no clue.

Britney Spears and Palms Hotel & Casino owner George Maloof were seen dining together and possibly discussing a third, fourth? comeback show. This concert, to take place in Vegas, would likely bump Britney’s bank account up $10 million. An insider tells Digital Spy:

“She wants to make a splashy comeback in Las Vegas. He wants the show to be full of high energy and flashy costume changes.”

If it’s anything like her performance at the MTV Music Awards, this will quickly devolve into an awkward dance number involving very little to no dance. Imagine, as the audience waits anxiously in their seats, the background vocals for Gimme More begin to play, the curtains raise and there will be Britney, crawling on all fours towards a 10 pound turkey. “Come here turkey. Imma eat you!,” she’ll be saying. Suddenly, she realizes, “Oh no, the show has started.” She’ll stand up, pop her hips left and right and in between her wheezing, sing/grunt, “Imma sexay girl. Imma sexay girl.”