Remember that story about Lenny Kravitz sleeping with A-Rod’s wife? That may have been a lie. Lenny Kravitz’s alleged affair with Cynthia Rodriguez is believed to be a planted story by his former manager seeking revenge for his recent firing.

Page Six explains that Lenny’s trainer, Dodd Romero, warned him that his manager, Guy Oseary, which he shared with Madonna and A-Rod, was about to “pimp out Madonna and A-Rod.” When Lenny found out, he canned Guy. Guy retaliated by making up the story of Cynthia and Lenny.

This is kind of confusing. I’d draw a picture for you, but it’d just turn into a drawing of me driving a stake through Madonna’s heart. Because that’s how you kill one of those things, right? Or was it with a silver bullet. What the hell is she anyway? I went through my book of mythical creatures and I couldn’t find one that was part Medusa, part She-Hulk and part Decaying Pop Star.

Cynthia Rodriguez filed for divorce from Alex Rodriguez on Monday. It is widely believed this is because of an affair between A-Rod and Madonna. The NYDN reports that now the vengeful Cynthia is spending A-Rod’s money like it was nothing. She recently charged $100,000 to his card during her trip to Paris. She “had spa treatments, she went to the best restaurants,” says a friend. Cynthia also planned on going to Spain where Lenny Kravitz was touring. Not only that, but she also assembled four lawyers in two different states and has blocked A-Rod from seeing his daughters while simultaneously claiming he’s an “absentee father.”

The onslaught from A-Rod’s side came after Cynthia fired a legal beanball at the Yankee slugger, accusing him in divorce papers of “extramarital affairs” and calling their six-year marriage “irretrievably broken.”

Cynthia, who is also seeking private school for the children and alimony, claimed she tried everything to save their marriage.

“The Petitioner has exhausted every effort to salvage the marriage of the parties. However, ‘Alex’ has emotionally abandoned his wife and children and has left her with no choice but to divorce him,” the divorce papers filed in Miami-Dade County Family Court state.

A-Rod, if you’re reading this, I know a friend of a friend who can “take care of this” for you. I can’t give you the specifics, but part of the plan involves giving me $500,000 to bang a lot of models.

Alex Rodriguez’s wife, Cynthia, has finally left him after a tumultuous three months in their five year marriage. This news comes two days after reports of A-Rod having an affair with Madonna and one day after reports of Cynthia having an affair with Lenny Kravitz. Today, the NYDN says Lenny Kravitz is merely giving Cynthia a place to stay. (Yea, IN HIS PANTS!)

“There is absolutely no affair between Cynthia Rodriguez and myself,” Kravitz said. “This is unequivocally 100 percent not true.”

Kravitz said references to him as an adulterer were “extremely hurtful,” adding that Cynthia came to stay at his home “to escape from everything happening in New York City.”

He says this now, but when rumors start surfacing of him sitting across from Cynthia in a half-open bathrobe going “Hello, Missus Rodriguez,” while spreading his legs, I’m going to be a little suspicious.