In “we ran out of ideas so we’re just going to start cashing in on nostalgia from the 80′s” news, there’s going to be an unnecessary Twins sequel. You know that movie that starred Arnold Schwarzenegger and Danny DeVito who played two brothers that looked to be polar opposites of each other? Yea, that one. Except this time, there’s a third brother and he’s black and played by Eddie Murphy. My word, what opposites.

Titled Triplets, the story would see Schwarzenegger and DeVito as brothers Julius and Vincent, conceived experimentally, who discover they have third sibling.

The project doesn’t have a director at this early stage — Ivan Reitman, who helmed the original, would only act as a producer with his Montecito Picture Co. cohorts Joe Medjuk, Tom Pollock and Ali Bell, according to sources — but the hunt is on for writers to develop the idea. Insiders caution that no substantial creative discussions have taken place between Universal and Montecito.

The actors are attached to star. THR

It’s been 14 years which is more than enough time to turn that terrible movie into a nostalgic childhood memory. Though it was nominated for a Golden Globe for Best Original Song and did win a Kid’s Choice Award for favorite movie actor: Arnold Schwarzenegger but that’s only because, by then, Arnold had already been in Conan, The Terminator and Predator. Nostalgia was even big back in the 80′s. Let’s just not remind anyone in Hollywood about Kindergarten Cop.

By the way, I know that image is from Total Recall but I just wanted to show you how I felt while reading this.

Brett Ratner resigned from producing this year’s Oscars on Tuesday due to the backlash from his “rehearsal’s for f*gs” comment and now Eddie Murphy has stepped down as the host as a show of solidarity.

“First and foremost I want to say that I completely understand and support each party’s decision with regard to a change of producers for this year’s Academy Awards ceremony. I was truly looking forward to being a part of the show that our production team and writers were just starting to develop, but I’m sure that the new production team and host will do an equally great job.” Hollywood Reporter

No clear reason as to why but I’m guessing it’s because there wouldn’t be enough f*g jokes or jokes about banging Olivia Munn before she turned Asian. How does one tickle America’s funny bone without those gems?

While everyone else knows nothing about the next Batman movie, The Sun is sitting in their high chair laughing at those peons chasing their tails. You see, they are in the know and are well aware of exactly who’s going to be in it. Are you ready for the big news? Hold on to your mind because it’s about to be blown.

The Beverly Hills Cop star, 47, has been signed up by British director CHRISTOPHER NOLAN to reprise the role played by JIM CARREY in 1995’s Batman Forever.

Execs have also signed up rising Transformers star SHIA LABEOUF, 22, to play Robin.

Meanwhile, Brit RACHEL WEISZ is said to be up for the Catwoman role.

Congratulations, The Sun. You are the winner. It only makes sense that Shia LaBeouf will play Robin since he recently played Harrison Ford’s sidekick in Indiana Jones. And of course Eddie Murphy will play The Riddler since he, um, loves wearing costumes? As long as we’re throwing names around, how about have William H. Macy play The Penguin and Jennifer Aniston play Batgirl? It makes just as much sense as the Eddie Murphy and Shia LaBeouf thing.

Eddie Murphy has continually denied being the father of Scary Spice’s newborn and was adamant about taking a blood test. Today, Melanie Brown’s rep revealed to People the results of the DNA test she conducted on her baby and Eddie Murphy. The consensus? Eddie Murphy is the father.

Of Brown, the source said, “There was no doubt in people’s minds anyways, least of all hers. It wasn’t a surprise to her. She knew all along.”

Eddie is probably still in a denial. Someone should explain to him this is what happens when you stick your penis in a real woman without protection. It’s kind of a lot different than sticking it in a tranny… so I’ve heard.

Despite Eddie Murphy’s adamant claims that he is not the father of Mel B’s baby, the former Spice Girl has named the “Norbit” actor as the father on her daughter’s birth certificate. Mel B is on the warpath to prove Eddie is Fortuna Daphne Bay’s daddy and has hired a lawyer to prove his paternity. Regardless, she doesn’t want Eddie in her daughter’s life.

“She doesn’t want him involved because he has hurt her too much. She just feels that he will have to accept responsibility at some point and there was no need for him to be so dismissive of their relationship.”

Whatever you do Eddie, don’t cover the baby’s face with whiteout and claim it couldn’t be yours because you’re black. That would be ridiculous. White paint from Walmart works just as well and all you have to do is dip her into one of those big paint buckets like an ice cream bar in crunchy almonds. Takes only 30 seconds.

Early Tuesday, Melanie “Scary Spice” Brown gave birth to what is assumed to be a human baby. Temporarily named Baby Brown, the 5lb. 4oz. baby girl is healthy and already has a good head of hair. The father is of yet unknown, but Eddie Murphy currently leads the race. Interestingly, the baby and Eddie Murphy share the same birthday. On a Dutch TV show last December, Eddie said about the pregnancy,

“I don’t know whose child that is until it comes out and has a blood test. You shouldn’t jump to conclusions, sir.”

Eddie Murphy wouldn’t know what to do with a vagina unless there was a prosthetic penis attached to it. So no, I don’t think Eddie’s the father either. On the other hand, this is Scary Spice we’re talking about. Factoring that in, Eddie may very well be the father. This is confusing. Why can’t they just toss the baby high into the air. If she lands head pointing to Scary, it’s Eddie’s. Otherwise she’s not. Simple, effective, brilliant.

Eddie Murphy lost out to Alan Arkin, the old guy from Little Miss Sunshine, who won Best Supporting Actor at the Oscars. Reports indicated Eddie left in haste shortly after because he was a sore loser. However, his rep says he would have done the same thing had he won.

“Eddie had always planned on leaving after his category was announced to spend the rest of the evening with his family,” says rep Arnold Robinson, adding, “He did the same thing following the Golden Globe Awards.” (Murphy did win at the Globes.)

I would think Eddie would be happy for Alan Arkin. They’re brothers from another mother. Eddie went from Dreamgirls to Norbit while Alan Arkin went from Little Miss Sunshine to Santa Claus 3. So how do you go from being Oscar nominated to a movie unfit to use as toilet paper? Perhaps Halley Berry would like to answer that. Yes, I’m talking to you Catwoman.

• Kelly Brook – Girls of FHM – 2007. Need I say more? [Bastardly]
• Angelina Jolie returns to Africa. [HB]
• Worst hair and makeup at the Oscars. [Celebitchy]
• The aliens are amongst us. [Ninjadude]

• John Travolta’s Oscar rug. [CityRag]
• Fun art with celebrities. [Celebrity Smack]
• Eddie Murphy is a sore loser? [Dlisted]
• Jimmy Kimmel’s take on Al Gore’s inconvenient song. [SOW]

• Reno 911 gets the job done. [Pajiba]
• Jessica Biel and Wilmer Valderrama. [Celebslam]
• Ana Beatriz Barros is sexy. [The Grumpiest]
• Will Ferrell’s song at the Oscars. [ICYDK]

Ya think? Eddie Murphy has already won a Screen Actor Guild award and a Golden Globe for his role in Dreamgirls. He’s expected to win an Oscar, but some are questioning how much his new “comedy” Norbit will hurt his chances. Norbit features Eddie in a really fat fat suit portraying an ignorant black woman.

“Every time I pass that billboard, it makes me sick,” said one veteran Oscar consultant, who declined to be identified and is not involved in a rival campaign. “I think his performance in ‘Dreamgirls’ is so fabulous” and deserves to win the Academy Award. But, he added, Murphy’s latest comedy offering “doesn’t help.”

I’m guessing that’s just one of the offending parts of the movie. It looked so stupid that when I saw the preview in theatres, my knee-jerk reaction was to punch someone in the back of the head. Regardless, the people behind Norbit think different. Like Apple!

“Norbit” could end up working in Murphy’s favor, the creative forces behind it say, because the comedy demonstrates Murphy’s range and ability to morph into multiple characters. It’s an approach the actor has used to great success in “Coming to America” and the two “The Nutty Professor” films. “Norbit,” about a wimpy man trapped in a horrible relationship with a woman (also played by Murphy), was co-written by Murphy and his brother Charles Murphy, and produced by the actor’s production company.

Hmm, right. It all makes sense now. Fat suits are only a means to an end. Eddie has to perpetuate stereotypes to evoke meaningful discussion amongst his peers. Martin Luther King would be so proud. So…where exactly do the tranny hookers come in?

So any of you want to hear about Mel. B? No? Well too bad. Scary Spice is “beyond gutted” after finding out through friends that Eddie Murphy dumped her. While Mel was on a plane from London to the US, Eddie Murphy was telling Dutch TV that he and Mel were over, that Tracey Edmonds is his new love and that he wanted a paternity test to prove Mel’s baby was his.

She was stunned to see so many photographers and couldn’t understand why they were all asking her how she felt. Then all of a sudden she got these messages asking if she was OK after what Eddie had done. At first she thought it was some kind of joke but then she called one of her friends who read the story down the phone to her.

This has nothing to do with the story because it’s funny on it’s own, but you know what would be great? If Eddie Murphy stopped releasing his awful cross dressing movies. I think I speak for everyone when I say I’d rather pound rusty nails through my ballsack than ever have to watch one of those things. Oh and Eddie. I think the baby is yours. You done gone stuck your penis in a woman this time.

TMZ has confirmed that Scary Spice (Melanie Brown) is 4 months pregnant with the transvestite loving Eddie Murphy’s baby. It is expected that these two will marry next month.

Brown, who has a 7-year-old daughter from a previous relationship, is a frequent shopper at the store and admitted the pregnancy had her feeling tired. Brown added that she was concerned she may be carrying twins since, she noted, they run in Murphy’s family.

That kid will have fun living with Eddie. Not because he’s a funny guy, but because they’ll never know if daddy is coming home with mommy or a tranny hooker. Now that I think about it, what’s the difference?

A lot of people thought Eddie Murphy marrying Mel B. was some sort of sham because last year there were reports Eddie Murphy might be gay. I ask you this. If Eddie Murphy were gay, would he be with Scary Spice?! Scary Spice is as woman as they get. By they I mean trannies and by that question I mean Eddie Murphy is still gay. The homosexual kind of gay.