Emma Watson talked about the highly anticipated kiss between her character Hermione Granger and Ron Weasley in The Deathly Hallows and managed to throw a diss at Twilight.

Watson said the kiss between her and Rupert Grint was exciting and awkward because the Harry Potter franchise isn’t selling sex like the Twilight franchise. Oh, snap. Shit just got real.

“This kiss between Hermione and Ron is highly anticipated, it’s been building up for eight films now. And Harry Potter is not Twilight, you know; we’re not selling sex.

“So, whenever there is any hint of that, everybody gets terribly excited. In fact, it was horribly awkward; we couldn’t stop laughing.”

I wouldn’t mess with Twilight fans. They’ll cut you with their spiked leather bracelet they bought at Hot Topic. Have you ever had thousands of hormonal pre-teens descend upon you like screaming banshees? It’s scary. You can’t even distract the fat ones by throwing donuts at them.

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows will be released Saturday at 12:01 a.m., but if you’re internet savvy, it was released yesterday on torrent sites everywhere with The Pirate Bay being the most notable one. Fans, however, are aiding in the good fight to report all those ne’er-do-well’s who make the book available. Which means, if you’re seeding one of these torrents, you better watch out for a 98 lb. kid wearing a cape and carrying a tree branch sneaking up from behind and shouting “Lightning bolt, lightning bolt!” at you. Meanwhile, the American publisher for the Harry Potter books, Scholastic Inc., tells people not to believe those photographed 784 bound pages because anyone can post anything on these here internets. Especially pictures of every page of the new Harry Potter book and porn. Don’t forget about porn. Sweet, succulent porn.

Interestingly enough, a guy from Newsweek named Nick Summers is doing a story about the leak and is asking leechers to chat with him at nickdotsummersatnewsweekdotcom or through IM at nicksummers05. I don’t know how real that is, but there is a Nick Summers working at Newsweek and if I wasn’t so hungry now, I’d bug him. Oh look, he’s online. Dum dee dum.

Update: Nick Summers is real and I couldn’t answer his questions before he signed off. Oops, sorry Nick.

• Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows (Book 7) [Amazon]

Rev. Gabriele Amorth, Pope Benidict’s chief excorcist (…oooook) , has called Harry Potter the “king of darkness, the devil” and compares Potter to Stalin and Hitler.

“Magic is always a turn to the devil,” said the Roman Catholic priest, according to Britain’s Daily Mail newspaper.

Tell that to 6th graders after you let them watch The Craft. They’ll be trying everything they can to chant up a cure for social awkwardness. So, listen to someone who’s matured a little. There is no cure. And there’s certainly not one for ugly people. The banner is of Emma Watson because you know.

17 year old Daniel Radcliffe who plays Harry Potter in the movies is set to debut on the London stage in Equus. Radcliffe plays a disturbed boy who takes off his clothes and blinds horses with a metal spike. This is Radcliffe’s first time on stage.

There’s nothing I would love more than watching Harry Potter run around naked on stage blinding horses. Maybe they can get some creative leeway and write Hermione in there. After a naked Harry Potter sticks a spike in the horse’s eyes, a naked Hermione can kick it in the balls. It’ll be the artsiest thing the world has ever seen and if you don’t understand it, then maybe you’re a communist.