Hayden Panettiere hasn’t starred in anything of note since Heroes ended. Scream 4 was probably her biggest movie so far and she was barely in it. She did gain a little notoriety for dating heavyweight boxer Wladimir Klitschko though but she broke up with him so that’s over.

Hopefully Hayden’s star will rise again when casting agents see her new spread in Interview magazine where she shows off her versatility as an actress. See? She can be slutty AND modest at the same time. Someone give this girl a job. Or a sex tape. I’m fine with either.

‘Tis the season to break-up with your significant other. I’m looking in your direction Scarlett Johansson.

Fresh off the heels of the Bar Refaeli and Leo DiCaprio split comes news that Hayden Panettiere and her gargantuan boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko have called it quits as well. Hayden said of the breakup,

“Even though we’ve decided splitting up is best for both of us, we have an amazing amount of love and respect for each other and remain very close friends.”

While Wladimir said,

“We had a great time together, but it’s not that easy to manage a relationship between two continents,” he says. “I have a lot of respect for Hayden as a person and as a friend, and I believe we’ll keep our friendship even after the separation.”

Hayden broke up with Wladmir didn’t she? And when she did, I fully expect Wladmir filled with so much sadness and rage that he yelled, “Wladmir SMASH!,” and broke tables with his head. Meanwhile, Hayden slowly backed out the door, onto a plane and back to the US.

If you think about it, the relationship wouldn’t have worked anyway. When you have to strap on rock climbing gear every time you want to have sex with your boyfriend, it gets sort of tiring.

Hayden Panettiere was at the Tribeca Film Festival in NYC with Wladimir Klitschko showing off her misspelled tattoo which is supposed to say “live without regrets” in Italian which is ironic since she has an extra “i” in hers and she probably regrets it.

Appearing on The View, Hayden warned that if you’re going to get a tattoo in a language, don’t ever go to that country or a country where anyone speaks that language.

“It’s not like, ‘Oh I wanted (this) and now it says, ‘I love apples’. It’s ‘live without regrets’ but it has one extra ‘i’ and it’s so minor that people who spoke fluent Italian are like, ‘Egh, that looks right.’ And of course I’m reading in a newspaper that it’s wrong…”

One day, we’ll all look back at this and laugh. At Hayden’s expense. That day is today and every day after, by the way.

Hayden Panettiere was on The Ellen DeGeneres Show on Tuesday to promote Scream 4 and talked about the most common question she’s been getting since dating her boxer boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko. People want to know how she, 5’1”, has sex with him, 6’6”. I imagine he just sticks it in her like a pole vaulter but let’s hear what Hayden has to say.

“He is quite a bit bigger than me,” the 5’1″ starlet, 21, said of her 6’6″ beau, 35.

“I get the prudest people coming up to me and they’re like, ‘Does it work?’ Yeah, it works. We find a way,” the Heroes alum said. “Where there is a will, there is a way!”

“[The people who ask me how sex works with my boyfriend] are very conservative people most of the time but that just have to know,” she explained. “Like, ‘I have to know, I just have to ask you this question. I’m really sorry but…’

Actually, I would have thought the most popular question she gets is “Say, little girl. You look really familiar…” Also, pics or it didn’t happen.

Here’s Hayden Panettiere giving Emma Roberts a bear hug. Rawr! Girl on girl! Yee-ha! Feel her up. Oh, what’s that? I need to leave the library now? Dammit.

Hayden Panettiere went to Germany for the Vitali Klitschko vs Odlanier Solis boxing match over the weekend to support her boyfriend’s brother. She was a good distraction because she was practically wearing half a dress. Odlanier must have stared at her chasm of cleavage long enough for Vitali to take the win.

Speaking of sexy Wednesdays, here’s one of Hayden Panettiere’s biggest fans squeling with glee before kissing her hand in Venice the other day. He’s such a gentleman and so classy! Look at those fingerless gloves (double checked this time) and that necklace around his head. I’m surprised he didn’t have a bow tie on his speedo. I’m also surprised Hayden didn’t get pregnant right then and there from his manliness. If I was Hayden, I’d have put my hand to my head and fainted from the excitement.

Actually, his brother. Hayden Panettiere hit up Hamburg, Germany on Monday to support her boyfriend’s brother’s boxing match. She got all sexy and as cleavagey as she could and showed off her legs. It was all part of an intricate plan to give Vitali’s opponent an erection so he’d have to fight hunched over with one hand over his crotch.

Hayden Paenttiere, her ogre boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko and her breasts showed up at Oktoberfest over the weekend. I have no idea what she’s doing these days after Heroes was canceled. Is she showing up to events with her boobs pushed up and out hoping to get bit parts in movies? Yea, sounds about right.

Hayden Panettiere attended the Earth Day screening of Avatar last night with her boyfriend Wladimir Klischko and a new hairstyle. Short. Like her. She looks like a miniature Sharon Stone. She looks creepy. Mainly because little people freak me out ever since Poltergeist and Leprechaun. They either talk jibber jabber to ghosts or kill you because they think you stole their pot of gold. What are they good for anyway?

Also, a nine foot tall blue thing from the movie showed up too. He apparently lost both his legs in the great Avatar war so now he has two peg legs. He’s now known as Peggy. Even though he’s a guy. He really hates it.

I wonder how sex with these two work? Does Hayden need to bring a rope ladder to the bedroom? She probably looks like Indian Jones climbing up on Wladimir. That would make a good porno actually. They don’t even have to change the title. Just call it Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom. The temple will be Hayden’s ass. The doom part will come when Wladimir sticks his dork in it.

Hayden Panettiere Oompa Loompa’d herself to attend a boxing match in Dusseldorf with her boxer boyfriend Wladimir Klitschko over the weekend. If anyone is wondering what shade of orange this is, it’s called Victoria Beckham #7.

Also, I have no idea what’s going on here. Usually girls don’t like it when you force them to their knees while all your friends gather around and laugh as you take a picture. Maybe I’m meeting the wrong girls.

Stop the presses. Hayden Panettiere dyed her hair red! This is exciting news. If I was a fashion-type blog, I’d say things like, “work it, girl!” and snap my fingers in the air. But I’m not. So I’m just going to tell you how much I want to do her because I have this midget fantasy, but have this fear of going full midget.