Jasmine Waltz had sex with David Arquette at least twice during his split with Courtney Cox. Now Jasmine is talking about how sex with David was over so fast and was so depressing that she wanted to kill herself. Well, she didn’t say that but it’s implied. From Life & Style’s press release:

Jasmine Waltz, waitress and model, first met David on Sept. 30th when he and a group of friends showed up at Premiere nightclub, where Jasmine was working. Within 20 minutes of meeting her, David revealed that he and wife Courteney Cox had separated. “I was surprised to hear that,” Jasmine tells Life & Style. “But his friends all seemed to know about it.” However, she says David seemed agitated and depressed about the split. “He was beaten down. He mentioned that he hadn’t slept with anyone since separating from Courteney.”

Just two nights later, David went back to the nightclub and after her shift ended, he took her to a house party. They both got very drunk, Jasmine says, and left the party around 2:30 a.m. Talking and strolling, they ended up at a Hollywood home – David told Jasmine it was the house he and his siblings had grown up in. Once they were alone, David was intent on having sex.

“It wasn’t bad sex,” she tells Life & Style, “but it wasn’t emotional. It was quick and painless. Nothing exciting.” She continues, “When we were done, he just looked at me and said, ‘This is the first time I’ve felt like a man in a very long time.’” Jasmine says it wasn’t just a one-time thing, she and David had sex again.

But she was adamant about making sure he was telling the truth about the split before sleeping with him. David assured her he was single and opened up to her about what had caused the split. “I definitely got the impression that Courteney had made the decision to separate,” Jasmine recalls. “David did not seem like the one in control of the situation. Not at all.”

Quick and painless is how you want to describe a trip to the doctor or a root canal. It isn’t how you want a girl to describe sex with you. And you definitely don’t want to go full emo and say stuff like “this is the first time I’ve felt like a man in a very long time” either. At least David had enough sense not to cry in front of her. That could have made things real awkward. Even more so.

Is that header photo of them at a memorial and is David crying? Jesus. I don’t know how Jasmine kept from slitting her wrists while she was with him.

Jasmine Waltz doesn’t want things to be so drama-filled and just wants to enjoy her 15 minutes of fame for being David Arquette’s one time conquest. Is that too much to ask? Waltz launched her own “Sinful Shake” at Millions of Milkshakes in LA this week and was unapologetic about milking (see what I did there?) her momentary fame.

“I like these cameras in my face,” Waltz said. “Who doesn’t? It’s attention, and I don’t think there’s many people out there that say, “I don’t want any attention.”

“I want to have fun with things, and I don’t want things to be so serious and so drama-filled,” she continued. “You just have to wake up with a smile on your face and be grateful for anything you have… that’s what I do.”

This whole fame whoring thing won’t be complete without a sex tape/Playboy spread/stunt casting. I give it a month before offers start rolling in and she pretends to act all demure.

David Arquette dumped Jasmine Waltz twice. Once when he ended their relationship and now, according to In Touch, when David fired her from his club.

Initially, David hired Jasmine to be the face of his new club at the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel. A friend said Jasmine had already been fitted for a catsuit uniform and posed for test shots. “David insisted that they hire her to be the face of the club. She was going to model for all the promotions and manage the cocktail servers.”

Days after the split, “He basically let her know that her services weren’t needed anymore,” the friend adds. “She has other jobs, but she’s bummed that he dumped her twice — by ending their romance and then firing her!” So he laid the money on the dresser and told her to GTFO.

If it’s any consolation, Jasmine, at least you got to have sex with David Arquette. Hey, why are you putting your head in your hands and sobbing?

Jasmine Waltz took exception to David Arquette’s Howard Stern interview where he said he only had sex with Jasmine once or twice. She put her palm in the air, made a screeching sound and said “hold up.” She’s now telling friends they had sex tons of times. Maybe hundreds, thousands even.

The woman with whom David Arquette claims to have had sex with “once … maybe twice,” is indignant, telling friends, “Two Times, My Ass!”

Sources are telling TMZ … Jasmine Waltz is indignant, claiming she had sex multiple times with David over the course of more than a month. She’s saying she met David through a mutual friend and started dating.

People associated with David tell us … everything that happened between David and Jasmineoccurred after he separated from Courteney Cox and after they reached an understanding that they could date other people. Jasmine is backing up this story.

It’s funny that Jasmine is so offended that people think she was just a one night stand. She’s no slut. She had sex with him a bunch of times. That’s called a relationship.

David Arquette called in to the Howard Stern Show to explain his separation with Courtney Cox. He mentioned that they haven’t had sex in 4 months starting from a month before they started shooting Scream 4. They drifted apart from there.

Arquette claims Courtney was the one who asked for a trial separation after their 11th wedding anniversary in June. She told David she was “tired of being your mother.”

David adds that he never cheated on Courtney before splitting but says he did have sex with Jasmine Waltz, “his one conquest.” Waltz is a former cocktail waitress who punched Lindsay Lohan inside Voyeur back in July. She’s dated Ryan Seacrest, Chris Pine and Jesse McCartney.

I figure any woman who Ryan Seacrest has been with is essentially ruined for me because there’s no way I can get the image of that little gremlin scurrying on top of a girl out of my head. My penis would just sit there doing the cross motion in the air.

Also, here are some alleged topless shots (NSFW) of Jasmine Waltz. I can’t really tell if it’s her or not but… tits!

Ryan Seacrest may not be as gay as everyone thought. Page Six says he was seen with a Megan Fox look-alike named Jasmine Waltz in Paris. A source says she’s a “cocktail waitress at Guys nightclub in LA and that’s where they met.”

Doing a Google image search gives a lot of pictures. Is that the same girl? She’s not really Megan Fox’s doppleganger. She looks more like Katharine McPhee than anyone else. Intrigued, I started doing some more digging, but then I asked myself why I cared so much about Ryan Seacrest’s rumored girlfriend. I couldn’t come up with a good answer so I stopped. Seacrest out.