Jennifer Connelly used to be so hot. This was mostly because of her huge breasts and her role in Requiem For a Dream (ass to ass). Now she’s 40 and a mother to three with Paul Bettany.

Her third kid popped out May 31 at their home via a scheduled home water birth in a birthing pool. Oh good. So she’s crazy, too.

“Everyone is healthy and doing well,” Connelly’s rep tells Us. “The family is very excited.”

Great. Now how am I going to yell “ass to ass” at her in front of her three kids and high five my friends without looking like a complete douche. Two kids I can do but three? That’s where I draw the line.

Jennifer Connelly used to get naked in movies and it was wonderful because she has amazing breasts. That hasn’t happened in a while. Now she’s 40 with a third kid on the way. This story just gets more and more depressing. For me, I mean.

Connelly and The Tourist star Bettany, 39, are already parents to son Stellan, 7, as well as Kai, 13, from her previous relationship with David Dugan.

“Becoming a mother has made all the difference in terms of learning to take more responsibility for myself and my life,” she has said.

“Parenthood changed the way I do everything. The biggest thing for me is wanting my kids to grow up safely and have happy lives. To me, that’s enough.”

Hey, that’s cool and all but tits or gtfo. Amirite?! High five!

It’s been a while since this feature made an appearance. Anyway, here’s Jennifer Connelly in a bikini in Bora Bora last week. Why can’t Lisa Rinna be like this? Deciding whether or not to click on pictures that say “Lisa Rinna in a Bikini” is like playing Russian Roulette. You never know if you’re going to be disgusted or slightly turned on.

The latest issue of Life & Style claims Jennifer Aniston had her co-star, Jennifer Connelly, booted off the Marie Claire cover shoot for their new film, He’s Just Not That Into You. Drew Barrymore and Ginnifer Goodwin, however, were allowed.

Connelly… will not be included in an upcoming cover shoot for Marie Claire magazine that will feature Aniston… and her other co-stars from the October comedy, Drew Barrymore and Ginnifer Goodwin. “Word is, Aniston threatened to pull out if Jennifer was part of the cover,” says an insider familiar with the movie’s shoot. “It was all about getting Jennifer Aniston front and center and looking as sexy as possible.”

Of course. Scarlett Johansson is notably absent from the approved list as well. This is the equivalent of a bride getting two fat cows to be her bridesmaids at her wedding so she can look good by comparison. if I was shooting the cover, I’d tell Jennifer Aniston to shut the hell up and shove Aniston’s face in between Jennifer Connelly and Scarlett Johansson’s breasts to piss her off. When people go to check out the movie because of the cover, they’ll probably start wondering where the hell Jennifer Aniston came from.

]]> http://theblemish.com/2008/06/jennifer-aniston-is-insecure/feed/ 2 http://theblemish.com/2006/12/jennifer-connelly-might-be-pregnant/ http://theblemish.com/2006/12/jennifer-connelly-might-be-pregnant/#comments Fri, 01 Dec 2006 18:54:07 +0000 Victor http://theblemish.com/2006/12/jennifer-connelly-might-be-pregnant/

Jennifer Connelly was at a screening of the Blood Diamond which prompted reports that she was pregnant. You can see a sort of bump in these pictures. It could also be gas or maybe she needs to lay off the cupcakes because she’s getting a little tubby.

God, I can’t believe what a slow news day does to me. All I really care about is seeing her ginourmous rack again. Cupid has a heart attack whenever she airs them out. I watch all her movies hoping for another taste, but ever since Requiem for a Dream it’s been one let down after another.

]]>