Breaking news! Jude Law now has a beard! Tell all your friends. Here he is leaving The Ivy in London after eating with co-star Ruth Wilson. This hard hitting news report brought to you by The Blemish where even the sky being blue is news.

Looks like you don’t have to wait for Harry Potter to see the first trailer for Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows because it’s on iTunes and YouTube right now.

I have to say though. I’m a little disappointed. The scenes are very typical of the first but I can’t believe they replaced Rachel McAdam’s ass with Noomi Rapace, the chick from The Girl With the Dragon Tattoo series. Rachel McAdams’ ass was so much hotter.

Jude Law’s head is such a hipster. It probably liked receding hair lines before they were popular.

More photos at Dlisted.

For the umpteenth time, Jude Law and Sienna Miller have split up. Most likely recently as they were seen together in the summer and vacationing together after Christmas.

A friend tells PEOPLE, “It is mutual and amicable and they are still friends.” They added that it happened several weeks ago and that, “It was an entirely an end-of-the-relationship decision. It had run its course.”

Whatever. You know once Jude starts dating some other girl, Sienna is coming in and having an affair with him. Sienna likes being the other woman as much as Khloe Kardashian loves raw cookie dough.

Being a celebrity must be amazing. Half your life is spent lying on a gigantic yacht in the middle of the ocean while the other half is spent reading words off a piece of paper. The hardest part about all this is being photographed by paparazzi. Illustrating this disheartening fact is Jude Law and Sienna Miller.

Although you’ll be glad to know things aren’t always as perfect as they seem. For example, in this picture Jude and Sienna look happy as Jude gets frisky but then in this picture (the header pic) things take a turn for the worse when Sienna shows Jude how big my dong is.

Jude Law was in the Czech Republic to pick up an award last week but I think it was a trick by the Czech Republic to get Jude drunk and make him sing karaoke. Here he is singing Johnny B. Goode. Hopefully whoever owns that basement hid the chained hookers like I do when I have guests. The first impressions are always the hardest.

Jude Law slept with Samantha Burke while he was shooting Sherlock Holmes. Samantha then told him she was pregnant and Jude did a face palm. Samantha gave birth and since then Jude has maybe seen his new daughter Sophia once. “He cuddled Sophia and admitted she looked beautiful but his visit was fleeting and seemed mainly businesslike.” He’s like Batman around illegitimate children.

However, Jude has agreed to pay Samantha $5,000 a month and bless his baby Sophia with at least two visits a year, once around Christmas. Not a bad deal for a girl looking for a payday. Samantha still has to work, but at least the baby will be taken care of and she’ll still have a chance to trick Jude into sleeping with her again to get another $5,000 a month.

Bad decisions. Jude Law and Sienna Miller are full of them. The latest being reported by OK! is that Jude and Sienna are getting engaged again.

“Sienna was always the one. And now she is back in his life he never wants to let her go again.

“Jude did some serious thinking over Christmas in Britain with his ex-wife Sadie [Frost] and the kids. And he realises just how important family life is to him.

“He needs a good woman to look after him. Sienna’s fed up of the single life and wants to be with Jude for good.”

The bad news is we’re going to have to put up with months and months of “Jude Law cheats on Sienna Miller!” headlines. The good news is that Sienna will be off the market and wives won’t have to lojack their husbands penises anymore.

The illegitimate daughter Jude Law had with Samantha Burke was born September 2009. He hasn’t seen her yet, but if reports are true, he might. Over the weekend, Jude called Burke to tell her that he was thinking of finally going to Florida to see Sophia, his daughter. This got Samantha real excited. Not because Sophia would finally get to meet her daddy, but because Sam thinks she can seduce Jude into being with her.

“She’s over the moon. She was hurt he had not seen Sophia,” a source told British newspaper the News of The World.

“She told us they would get back together but I think Jude just feels a responsibility to his daughter,” revealed the insider.

“Sam is also considering moving to London. It could be the career chance she wanted.”

This is all hearsay from The News of the World so take this with a grain of salt. Jude might not visit his daughter at all. He might even deny the very existence of the kid. See, it’s publications like The News of the World that give celebrities a bad rap by suggesting they’d finally visit their illegitimate kid after four months.

Riding high off his box office Sherlock Holmes success, Jude Law and Sienna Miller hit up Barbados over the holidays to frolick on the beach and play with Jude’s three kids. Jude’s fourth is still somewhere in the US locked in a basement. I’m not even sure he remembers he had a fourth.

Last we left these two, Jude and Sienna broke up when Jude slept with the nanny and then Sienna started sleeping with married men to break-up their relationships. Now they’re back together and wives and wombs alike can rest easy.

Rumors are flying (they aren’t. I’m making this sound more exciting than it really is) that Jude Law and Sienna Miller are back together again. They were celebrating Thanksgiving at Emporio in NYC where they got a private table, ordered pizza, a $350 bottle of wine and started making out. Turns out the private tables at Emporio aren’t actually private and that pizza is a wonderful aphrodisiac despite girls telling you otherwise.

“They had no problem flaunting their love right in the middle of the restaurant. They definitely looked like they were head-over-heels for each other.”

“They came in holding hands and kept touching each other and kissing throughout the entire meal,” says the insider. “They only had eyes for each other!”

The thought of them sticking their tongues into each other while pepperoni and tomato sauce fall out of their mouths is really sexy. I may have to go masturbate. Also, Sienna is probably pregnant now.

A “spy” spied Jude Law and Sienna Miller hanging out on Thursday night after their respective Broadway performances. Jude stars in Hamlet and Sienna stars in After Miss Julie. The two hit up The Box at 1 a.m. where they got a table with a few friends, got drunk, laughed, possibly whispered sweet nothings in each others ear and left together at 3:30 a.m. Naturally, we’ll jump to the conclusion that they’re hooking up again.

“Jude’s a regular at The Box and a lot of people know him there,” the source said. “So he had a ton of people coming up to say hi to him, many of them female, but he really only seemed interested in Sienna.”

So much so, in fact, that at one point he brought the actress to meet another group of friends, and led her through the crowded club by the hand.

“It looked like he wanted people to see that they were together,” the partygoer dished.

I’d hate to be Jude and have all these people swarming around me when I’m trying to get some chick drunk. That must be annoying. Having witnesses.

Jude Law had the well thought out idea of moving to a place overlooked by NYU’s freshman dorm. Turns out it’s great for the leering students, not so much for Jude. One co-ed, Erica Rose, describes the joy of living next to a Jude Law, “We have the best view on the floor,” she said. “It is exciting to have a celebrity living right next to you. He is really attractive. He’s rugged and scruffy.” In return for their enthusiasm, Law, gracious as he is, even pauses his yoga sessions to welcome gawkers to the neighborhood with a barrage of oranges.

“He noticed we were there and we started waving at him. Then he went inside and came back with two oranges,” freshman Neha Najeeb told The Post. “He threw them at our window, but he missed.” Law then went back inside and returned with two additional oranges, she said.

“This time, he hit the windows — there was orange pulp on the glass for a week — and then he went back to working out,” she said. “Now we don’t like Jude Law anymore.”

As you know, oranges mean good luck in Asian cultures so the NYU students shouldn’t take being pelted with them as a threat. Jude is merely too far away to hand it to them in person. So continue spying on Jude with binoculars or long lenses equipped with night vision. He loves it.