Gossip Girl star Leighton Meester, last seen munching on a gigantic pretzel, is apparently hooking up with Mac Guy, Justin Long. The two are in New York where Leighton is filming Gossip Girl.

A source told us, “Justin has a place on the Lower East Side, and they have been spending a lot of time together.” In May, the pair were spotted sharing a romantic dinner in LA before leaving restaurant La Poubelle holding hands. Long split with Drew Barrymore last year. Meester played Long’s girlfriend who leaves him at the beginning of the 2010 movie “Going the Distance.” [Page Six]

On Justin Long’s IMDB profile it should just read, “Quietly banging Hollywood since 2001.” There’s really no reason anyone should be dating that dork but they are and he stays out of the press for the most part. What’s his secret? Is it a big penis, a gigantic hunting knife or a combination of the two?

Gossip Girl’s Leighton Meester may be dating Justin Long. A witness tells PEOPLE they were holding hands outside La Poubelle in Hollywood where they ate dinner on Sunday for two hours. Rumor is Justin will ask Leighton to go steady with him at the sock hop.

An onlooker said, “They were happily willing to talk to fans who approached them.”

This is an upgrade over Drew Barrymore. Leighton Meester is hot so this is impressive as well for a guy who walked around in front of a white screen shilling for Apple. It almost makes me want to buy a Mac. I mean, you don’t see the PC guy banging Blake Lively. Someone also told me using a Mac makes your penis bigger. is that true? Because I have my doubts.

If you’re wondering how that Mac Dude dork Justin Long gets women, here’s your answer. Hint: It’s not that snazzy jean jacket/pinkish shirt combo although that certainly doesn’t hurt.

Long was part of a reading of Filthy Talk for Troubled Times: Scenes of Intolerance the other day. He played the role of a misogynistic male restaurant patron bemoaning feminism and cunnilingus.

Afterward, Long was asked if it was a difficult part to play on account of him being, you know, not that way.

Frankly, no. I think it’s just been festering and welling. All that great stuff, that darkness that we repress — it’s nice to be able to release it once in a while. It was very therapeutic.” But Long pointed out that he didn’t identify with every aspect of his character. “There were parts about certain … well, acts that men supposedly don’t like performing on women that I have very strong feelings against. I would very much argue the opposite.”

There you have it. Justin Long loves women sitting on his face. Girls will probably be all over him now. If he said he came chocolate and farted LV bags, he’d basically become a god to them.

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In news that’s probably about as exciting as that cat on your lawn, Drew Barrymore and Justin Long may be back together. They were spotted at the after-party for Grey Gar dens “giggling and kissing each other all night and leaving together.”

Remember when Drew Barrymore was interesting and did stuff like flash David Letterman and have an eating disorder? Those were better times. Happier times. More erotic times. Now she’s dating the Mac guy and all she wants to do is act like a high schooler and get fat. It’s really depressing when you think about it. Which is why I try not to. Right now I’m thinking about ponies. I can’t tell you why, but the pony I’m thinking of can fly. Wheee. What were we talking about again?

Drew Barrymore broke up with Justin Long  eight months ago. Now they’re hanging out again and engaging in “full-on PDA.” Life & Style has the sordid details.

“They couldn’t get enough of each other. I don’t think they even noticed that there were other people in the room! In between kisses it was all smiles and laughs.” The next night, the lovers reunited at Ike sushi in Hollywood. “They sat at the sushi bar and ordered Sake and dinner. They were both in a great mood. They were smiling ear to ear the whole time, and laughing and looking they were so happy they were going to burst.”

“Once they polished off the sake, Justin ordered a Sapporo beer and split it with Drew. Justin grabbed Drew’s hand and held it on his thigh. They looked in love. They finished their dinner with him springing for the tab, and walked out arm in arm.”

The most amazing thing here is that after reading this, I still don’t care about either of them. When I hit kisses and smiles, I realized my chair spins. So, that’s what I’ve been doing for the past 30 minutes.

Justin Long must hate his penis. He broke up with Drew Barrymore then hooked up with Kirsten Dunst and now he’s punishing his wiener by doing the sexytime with the supposedly bisexual troll Tila Tequila. Page Six reports:

But on Halloween, the “Mac Guy” hooked up with trampy bisexual Tila Tequila in Las Vegas. Spies said the two were spotted at Los Angeles airport and nightclub Noir, where Long “asked her to straddle him while making out. Eww,” our spy sniffed.

Justin’s penis will be traumatized by the time he finishes putting it through this unrelenting torture. His penis will develop this weird tick where every time he unzips his pants for whatever reason, it will quiver, clutch its blankie and rock back and forth chanting, “Never again, never again.” I have no doubt that if Justin’s penis could slap him in the face (a self-cockslap?) and tell him to wake the fuck up, it would.

Drew Barrymore dumped Justin Long not too long ago. Attempts have been made by Justin to find a rebound girl, but reports indicate he’s still very “distraught.” So much so that he has pulled out of his directorial debut for Whip It.

“He couldn’t stand working with her and not being with her. He’s too upset,” the source said. “She dumped him. She was hot and cold. One minute she was in love with him and the next she wanted to break up with him.”

Christ. He was dumped by Drew Barrymore, not by Scarlett Johansson. I can understand if he took one day off to ponder the question of “how am I going to get laid now?,” but there’s no reason to be this upset. He makes it sound like Drew killed his dog or stole the last slice of pizza.

Justin Long broke up with Drew Barrymore a week ago and it looks like he’s recovered, kind of. OK! Magazine says Justin was spotted holding hands with Kirsten Dunst in NYC.

“They stayed out all night and Kirsten was all over him and kept leaning in to kiss him.”

Page Six, however, says two days before Justin Long, Kirsten Dunst had her sights set on Emile Hirsch. She was seen stalking outside of the Bowery Hotel.

“Kirsten was there just to see Emile.” After she finished her cig, the source said, Kirsten followed the press-shy actor to club Bowery Electric next door. “She was all alone,” our snitch said. “She was going to the bar just to see him.”

Really? Kirsten Dunst? The only redeeming quality about her is if you were stranded in the jungle, she’d be able to join a pack of lions undetected to take down a deer and bring some of the kill back to you. Other than being bitey, all she does is sit there and look ugly. What gives? Is that even legal?

Drew Barrymore and the Mac guy, Justin Long, have broken up after nearly a year of dating. No details have been given other than a rep confirming the news. A source said that they remain friends.

God, this is boring. Justin Long should have broken up with Drew by drowning her cat. That way I could come up with a clever title like, “Justin Long hates Drew Barrymore’s wet pussy.”

JL: Hi. I’m Justin Long. I look edgy, but am actually devoid of any utility.

DB: Hi. I’m Drew Barrymore. I used to be unpredictable and fun, but now I’m frumpy and boring.

With any luck, that timely pop-culture reference will have revealed how I feel about these two.