Kyra Sedgwick appeared on David Letterman last week and talked about this one time she pressed a mysterious button at Tom Cruise’s house. Surprisingly, a bunch of dildos and a chained up Thai boy didn’t shoot out of the wall. Instead,

“I saw this little button and it wasn’t attached to anything. It didn’t have a sign or anything… and so I pressed it. I don’t know why but I did, and nothing happened.

“I got scared. So I kind of raised my hand and I said, ‘Excuse me… I just pressed that button!’ And Tom said, ‘That button?’ I said, ‘Yeah.’ And he goes, ‘Why?’ And I said, ‘I don’t know!’

“Long story short, it was the panic button. Within 10 minutes the entire Beverly Hills police department was there, and they wouldn’t leave until they actually saw Tom there.”

It must be nice being a celebrity and having the entire LA police force working for you. I think if I ever called the police, they’d take an hour to get to me and even if I’m unconscious lying in a puddle of my own blood, they’d still ask in an annoyed voice, “What seems to be the problem, sir?”

[Bauer]

Prepare yourself for another exciting day in the dumb antics of famous people.

1. John Mayer has a secret love he wants to keep hidden and it’s not Jessica Simpson. Don’t feel so ashamed John. [Stereogum]
2. Kevin Bacon and wife Kyra Sedgwick gave their dog away after one of its eyes popped out of its socket. [Celebrity Dog Watcher]
3. Dave Navarro was his dapper self on New Years. [Celebrity Smack]
4. Angelina Jolie is the Virgin Mary of Walmart. [Celebitchy]
5. Whitney Houston had a yard sale. [CityRag]
6. The O.C. has been canceled. [The Evil Beet]
7. Brad Pitt hits the Caribbean. Women everywhere swoon. [Hot Momma Gossip]
8. Emilie de Ravin, the blond chick from Lost, is now single. Fun fact: She was raped in the Hills Have Eyes. [I'm Not Obsessed]
9. The 24 season premiere should be awesome. [Just Jared]