A judge let Lil’ Wayne postpone his prison date until March 2nd because of “critical dental surgery”. TMZ says Lil’ Wayne underwent an eight hour surgery on Tuesday in which dentists gave him eight root canals, worked on his grill, redid several tooth implants, added more implants and repaired what little real teeth he had left.

You know the inmates at Rikers are going to try and jack his teeth in the middle of the night. One day he’s going to wake up with two big dudes holding him down while another guy hovers over him with a pair of pliers saying stuff like, “you got real purdy teef.”

Lil’ Wayne was scheduled to perform at Fashion Rocks last Friday night, but ended up being taken off the show due to his refusal to have his bag searched and to have himself wanded even though everyone including Rihanna, Chris Brown, Beyonce, Justin Timberlake and Kid Rock obliged. Page Six reports:

“But he wouldn’t budge and refused to have his bag searched or have a security wand passed over him. Then he started getting abusive: ‘I don’t need your [bleeping] show – I’m leaving if you make me do this.’ So he had to leave, I mean, who knows what was in that bag?

“He got back in the car we’d paid for and drove off. Minutes later, we got frantic calls from his management and record label begging us to have him back. We said, ‘OK, we have an opening at 7 p.m.’ The next thing you know, Wayne’s people are saying, ‘Can we do a bit later. He’s not going to be ready.’

“We had a crew of 250 people waiting for him . . . Then he calls at, like, 9:30 and says, ‘I’m five blocks away,’ which is like 500 blocks away in New York traffic, so we just pulled the plug. It was just so disrespectful to the crew and to the 5,000 audience members. Unbelievable.”

I’m going to give four choices on what might have been in the bag. You choose the right one.

1. A brick of cocaine
2. Guns
3. A dying midget on his last breath
4. His dignity and/or career

I’m leaning towards the midget. I hear they freak Lil’ Wayne the hell out what with their tiny limbs and Oompa Loompa-like dancing.