OK! Magazine calls Lindsay Lohan a Faux-mosexual in their thrilling piece about Lindsay’s latest flip-flop in her sexuality (I prefer fun-sexual). Friends tell OK! that while her relationship with Samantha is suffering, she’s been flirting, laughing and giggling with guys. A clear indication that she craves the cock that was once part of her food pyramid.

“Lindsay is the aggressive one in the relationship,” an insider tells OK!. “Sam tries to focus on Lindsay, but it’s never enough.” Another friend adds, “Lindsay has to be the center of attention, or she’ll flirt with other guys to make Sam jealous.”

It’s not surprising that this lasted as long as it did. Samantha kind of looks like a boy. Still, one can only pretend for for so long. I’m sure fisting was great and all, sort of like sticking your hand into a pit of despair, but it just didn’t feel the same to Lindsay.