Maria Menounos was also at Wango Tango over the weekend where she showed off her Dancing with the Stars injuries on the blue carpet. That or she was really proud of her sex bruises. As any woman should be after a night with me.

Maria Menounos, Debra Messing and Taraji P. Henson pose “topless” in Allure. “Topless” is in quotes because technically they’re topless but you can’t see anything. It’s just a marketing term magazines use to get you to look inside. And dammit, it worked. Oh, why am I so easily manipulated.

At the end of May, Maria Menounos fell on her Dancing With the Stars partner Derek Hough’s leg and cracked two ribs during rehearsal. She kept rehearsing anyway. Now she’s back to work but not without taking precautions.

I’m icing when I get home. My friend Joe drives me from rehearsals and I have a pedicure station with ice in it in my car, so I ice my whole body down.”

“Once I get home, I get in a hot tub and in an Epsom salt bath,” Menounos told Us. “I can’t believe how dangerous dancing is! I told Derek, ‘I don’t understand! I played ice hockey, football, basketball — when did I get so fragile?’ Unfortunately the Hough’s too rough!”

Menounos’ injury “could take months” to heal, but she’s “having shots and taking calcium and other vitamins.”

“The doctors said they can feel the bone growing and it’s a good sign,” Menounos told Us. “The doctor told me to rest but I said there is no way I can quit. I have been just doing the best I can. “Us

I call BS. There’s no way Maria had two broken ribs and kept rehearsing much less breathing without pain. Unless of course she meant a week later. Then yea, I’d believe it. But even with bruised ribs, she’s still a champ for going back to work. If this were me, I’d still be on the floor holding my side and rolling around in pain.

Maria Menounos made a bet that if the Patriots lost to the Giants, she would host Extra in a Giants bikini. As you may have heard, that’s exactly what happened so here she is in a bikini. God she is so hot. She should make terrible bets more often.

Maria Menounos was at the beach again over the holidays. This time wearing a better bikini. One that showed off more of her assets. Get it. Because assets begins with “ass” and that’s what I’m referring to. Haha, I’m funny, huh.

Maria Menounos trounced around Miami in a tiny bikini and I think I’m in love. She was with that publicist dork Jonathan Cheban but that little problem is nothing a lead pipe can’t take care of.

As previously stated, Maria Menounos was also in a black bikini at Miami Beach over the weekend. This time she wasn’t drinking a buck of booze unfortunately. What’s up with her boyfriend though? He looks like one of those things that evolve and eventually crawl out of caves.

Maria Menounos hit up Miami Beach in Florida with her boyfriend over the weekend wearing a leopard print bikini and drinking from a Bucket O’ Booze. Her boyfriend has the right idea. He needs to loosen her up a little so she takes off her top. C’mon, baby. Don’t be shy.

Guess where Maria Menounos was last Friday? That’s right. In my pants. No, just kidding. She was at Miami beach. She can still be in my pants though. Come on, Maria. Let’s make this happen.

It’s impressive that after all these years, she still looks great. This almost makes up for all those other lackluster celebs in bikinis earlier.

Lakers fans better step up their game. Jojo and Eliza Dushku both showed their Celtics love a couple of weeks ago. Now Maria Menounos is doing it in a bikini. That’s three hot chicks repping the green.

Who do the Lakers have? No one. Well, maybe Dustin Hoffman and Jason Bateman. I can give them that since it’s pretty ambiguous from those photos who they’re rooting for. That should pump up those Lakers fans, amiright?

• Beyonce Knowles gets an award. [Yeeeah!]
• Michael Clarke Duncan and Maria Menounos? [Bastardly]
• Angelina Jolie’s changing Oscar style. [Celebitchy]
• Justin Timberlake reunites with Andy Samberg. [Celebrity Smack]
• Does Britney not know her own age? [Evil Beet]
• Adam Sandler is back. [Pajiba]
• John Travolta’s cock-pit. [CityRag]
• Keifer Sutherland to star in Mirrors. [Glitterati]
• Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant. [ICYDK]
• American’s don’t idolize forgiveness. [MollyGood]
• Kylie Minogue is over her breakup. [ASL]
• Little Rachel Riding Hood. [Popsugar]
• VH1 has another reality show about has been boy band singers. [IDLYITW]
• Sayaka Uchida. [Celebslam]

Disneyland France could very well be the happiest place on Earth. At least for Minnie Mouse. Video fixed…for now.

Angelina is literate – Angelina Jolie attempts to read a book. No one is fooled. Everyone knows she planned the hit on the 19-year-old bicyclist.

Big Bird almost got a reach around – Maria Menounos almost gave Big Bird something he missed out on during his stint on Seasame Street. An orgasm.

Jenny McCarthy wears a bra during sex – Jenny McCarthy keeps her bra on during sex because she’s self-conscious about her c-section scar, floppy breasts and stretch marks. Everything that could happen to this girl’s chest already did and it doesn’t sound too pretty.

Nicole Kidman isn’t pregnant – Ending months of on and off speculation, Nicole wore a tight fitting dress showing off her non-pregnant body. At the same time, her face still creeps me out.