Megan Fox has a gaudy Marilyn Monroe tattoo on her right arm. It’s less of a tribute and more of a sign of poor life decisions. Megan explains, “I really admire Marilyn Monroe but I would never try to emulate her. I got the tattoo as a warning. It warns me not to let myself be treated so badly by the film industry so that it breaks me down.”

Turns out she doesn’t need that reminder anymore because who cares. Being broken down by the film industry just means more money. So she’s having the tattoo lasered off. Megan showed up at a recent Armani event with a faded Marilyn Monroe face on her arm.

Good riddance, I say. I don’t need some dead chick staring at me while I’m getting a handjob.

Hat tip: Celebs.

There is very little chance of this happening and this rumor seems like it only started because some guy wants to promote his book, but the Telegraph reports production is due to start soon on the film adaptation of The Life and Opinions of Maf the Dog written by Andrew O’Hagan.

The story tells of the last two years of Marilyn Monroe as seen through the eyes of Maf, a Maltese terrier gifted to her by Sinatra in 1960. George Clooney is said to be attached to play Sinatra and Hagan seems to believe Angelina Jolie will play Marilyn. Cue slow eye roll.

Speculation over the project has been growing over the last few months. Scarlett Johansson had been linked to the Monroe role, and Mr O’Hagen had previously suggested that Mad Men actress Christina Hendricks could also play the lead role.

According to the book’s description, Maf – short for Mafia – met several famous faces from the era, including President John F. Kennedy. The dog also accompanied Monroe to acting classes, restaurants, department stores and to Mexico for her divorce from playwright Arthur Miller.

“Marilyn was a strange and unhappy creature, but at the same time she had more natural comedy to her than anybody I would ever know,” observes Maf, who was 3 when Monroe died in 1962 at age 36.

They should make this a CGI film like Garfield. Don’t forget the 3D either. What better way to tell a ridiculous story of Marilyn Monroe than with ridiculous current technology?! Is what I would say if I was a studio exec.

Here’s Angelina being glittery at the UK premiere of Salt.

Lindsay Lohan is back. This time for another Marilyn Monroe themed photoshoot. Lohan along with a bunch of other celebs have a strange obsession with the pop icon. Maybe it’s because Marilyn’s initial lack of talent never stopped her from becoming the most desired woman of her time and that gives them hope or maybe it’s because they’re all just big whores.

Everyone young starlet wants to be the next Marilyn Monroe and oddly enough, Paris Hilton has come the closest. The only reason being is that both Paris Hilton and Marilyn Monroe had a sex tape in which they blew a guy. However, unlike Paris Hilton’s tape, Marilyn Monroe’s is still classified by the FBI and was just sold for $1.5 million to a New York businessman despite being only 15 minutes long, black and white and silent. Some may argue Paris Hilton’s tape was pretty silent too, but that’s just because she sucks in bed.

The footage appears to have been shot in the 1950s. When it came to light in the mid-’60s, then-FBI Director J. Edgar Hoover had his agents spend two weeks futilely trying to prove that Monroe’s sex partner was either John F. Kennedy or Robert F. Kennedy, according to declassified agency documents and interviews, Morgan said.

The silent black-and-white flick shows Monroe on her knees in front of a man whose face is just out of the shot.

He never moves into the shot, indicating that he knew the camera was there, but Monroe never looks at the lens, said Morgan, who saw the footage.

Silent porn old-timey porn is too weird. Imagining this is hard. I just see Charlie Chaplin in his hat, swinging a cane around with a pleased look on his face while Marilyn goes down on him. And the footage is moving at twice the normal speed and it’s interspersed with framed screens of text that read “Mmmm!” and “Choke on it, bitch!” Charlie Chaplin was always so angry.

Telling Lindsay Lohan that she looks like the spitting image of Marilyn Monroe is akin to telling a fat girl that she looks like Kelly Brook. It’ll give you about five minutes worth of entertainment, but it won’t fill that void. That being said, I don’t know why Marilyn Monroe’s best friend told Lohan she looked like the sex symbol unless she was actually making fun of Lohan’s pale body.

Sharon Stone also told Lohan she resembled someone. Namely, herself. If I was a girl and Sharon Stone told me I looked like her, my first reaction would be to cry hysterically, but not before I mustered enough strength to slap her across the lips.