Move aside Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie. Say hello to Hollywood’s newest power couple, Nikki Cox and Jay Cox Mohr. Both seen here venturing out of their home in New York’s sewer system to attend a Knicks’ game.

Oh and also, Jay’s not excited about the game, he’s excited to see light for the first time in two years.

[Image via Splash News]

At least she never has to dress up for Halloween. That’s something. Right? Guys? Why are you running? You training for a marathon?

Nikki Cox made an appearance at the People’s Choice Awards yesterday and damn, she must be on a plastic surgery kick. She’s gone from normal, to duck lips and now to cat face. Pretty soon she’ll have the celebrity animal face market cornered. Admittedly a very small niche, but I assure you, a highly competitive one. Click through for the larger version.

Two years into his marriage with Duck Face, Jay Mohr filed a petition to add his wife’s surname to his. If approved, his full name will be Jon Ferguson Cox Mohr.

Jay might as well have gone the whole nine yards and made it Mohr Cox. For their future kid’s sake. Bullies aren’t too adept at making up humiliating nicknames and thinking only enrages them more.

God bless Hollywood’s obsession with perpetual beauty. God bless celebrities for injecting their lips with fat in order to achieve said beauty. God bless these same celebrities for not realizing all it does is make them look like Daffy the Duck. Without these people with low self-esteem and high spending limits, I would never have known the joy of mockery.

Scientists believe that leaving a trail of breadcrumbs is the best way to make a Nikki Cox follow you home. Also, it is best to do this during the summer months as she is likely to make her way South when temperatures begin to drop.

I’ve talked about Nikki Cox’s face before, but I only provided a low quality video of when she was on Ghost Whisperer. Today a few quality images of her and her husband Jay Mohr at CBS Upfront in New York came out. As you can see, those dastardly directors shot her at a bad angle. Her face isn’t weird looking at all. No, it’s completely GD ridiculous. Don’t I feel stupid now.

Women take note. When your lips take up 50% of your face, you’re not sexy, you’re just fucking weird.

In Hollywood, the pressures to be beautiful have driven many celebrities to undergo plastic surgery. Some people like Heidi Montag, who was once an insufferable bitch, but is now a bearable bitch thanks in part to her new c-cups, have turned out for the better. Relatively I guess. Others haven’t fared so well. Take for example, Nikki Cox. Nikki was once a decent looking redhead with a kickass body and insanely huge breasts.

Now with the gift of lip injections, she looks, how do I put this delicately, fucked up. Sort of like a fish, but uglier. When you talk to her, you half expect her to start gasping for air and thrashing around on the floor because she’s out of water. If you searched for her profile on Match.com, under “Dream Guy” it would say “Swamp Thing.” In an 80 MPH head-on collision, her lips could serve as an airbag. In the event that your airplane crashes in the ocean and Nikki Cox is sitting by you, do not hesitate to sit on her face ASAP. Her lips CAN be used for a flotation device. The only way she could look more ridiculous is if she painted her face like a sad clown and frowned and then fought an ostrich. Naked. Although, even then you’d still be asking why they replaced her mouth with a vagina.

Some old photos of Nikki below.

Props to ONTD for noticing this. Also, props to Jay Mohr for not bursting out in laughter when filming his scenes with Nikki.