After winning Best Actress at the Oscars last night, Jennifer Lawrence took a shot and hit up that room where a bunch of numbers in seats ask her questions about her win. She handled the questions pretty well even though some of them were awful like, “What was the process of getting ready. How many people helped you. What was the process today to get to the big moment.”

Christ, you get to ask Jennifer Lawrence a question and you ask her what it was like to put on a dress? What do you think it was like? She took a shower and put on a dress. Which is exactly what Jennifer told the guy. Sure, she padded it with some details saying the house was chaotic and she felt like Steve Martin in Father of the Bride but that was just for his benefit.

That guy probably jerks it listening to girls describe how they get dressed and gets off when they mention “Armani” and “cap sleeves” in the same sentence. What a perv.

Bonus: Jennifer Lawrence gets starstruck meeting Jack Nicholson.

The post Jennifer Lawrence Wins Best Actress, My Heart appeared first on The Blemish.

Last night at the Oscars, Kristen Stewart was walking the red carpet on crutches and looking pretty disheveled. Turns out it wasn’t date night with Chris Brown.

According to her makeup artist, Beau Nelson, Kristen “cut the ball of her foot, quite severely, on glass two days ago.” Adding that she’s in “a little bit of pain.”

Translation: Kristen Stewart got really high the other day, dropped her glass bong and accidentally stepped on shards of broken glass.

No explanation as to why she looked like she just rolled out of bed but looking like the dirtiest hippie in the room is sort of her calling card now.

The post Kristen Stewart Was Disheveled and Limping Last Night appeared first on The Blemish.

Alright, alright. Charlize Theron technically didn’t save a man’s life but when a security guard suffered a seizure at the Dolby Theater last night before the Oscars began, Charlize was one of a few people who went over to help while an ambulance was called.

If I was that man and saw Charlize Theron hovering over me, you would have seen me straining to whisper to her, “I think I need mouth to mouth.”

The post Charlize Theron Saved Someone’s Life Before the Oscars appeared first on The Blemish.

Last night was Hollywood’s biggest event of awards season. The Oscars. It was a chance for the Hollywood elite to sit down in a room together and pat each other on the backs while Seth MacFarlane made fun of them.

The night got off to a decent start when MacFarlane opened up the show singing about whose boobs he’s seen in which movies. Naomi Watts in Muholland Drive, Anne Hathaway in Brokeback Mountain, Charlize Theron in Monster, Jodie Foster in The Accused, Kristen Stewart in On the Road, and Kate Winslet in “whatever you’re shooting right now.” What made the bit was the crowd reactions. Namely Naomi Watts who made an expression like someone told her they just killed her dog.

It would have been way better if she wasn’t in on the bit. Meanwhile, Jennifer Lawrence gave a fist pump when Seth sang, “We haven’t seen Jennifer Lawrence’s boobs at all.”

That wasn’t the only musical number in the show either. I think the entire night was Seth MacFarlane’s demo reel.

Later on during the acceptance speech for Best Visual Effects which Life of Pi won, the theme to Jaws started playing when they were trying to bring attention the special-effects artists out of a job and picketing outside the Oscars. Nicole Kidman summed up the moment nicely.

Since the theme of the night was “musicals,” there were about 20 of them all rolled into one segment. Jennifer Hudson, Anne Hathaway, Catherine Zeta-Jones, Hugh Jackman, Russell Crowe and more all sang songs from their respective musicals. The one that stood out was Catherine Zeta-Jones. Not for her heavenly voice, but because she was lip-syncing.

Then there was that moment when Sandra Bullock tried to open the envelope for Best Film Editing going into ogre mode.

Other notable moments include Daniel Day-Lewis winning his third Best Actor trophy for Lincoln, Jennifer Lawrence winning Best Actress for Silver Linings Playbook, Anne Hathaway for support-actress for Les Miserables, which John Travolta pronounces funny, and Christoph Waltz for winning his second supporting actor Oscar for Django. Meanwhile, Tarantino won his second Oscar, this time for original screenplay.

Oh and when Jennifer Lawrence went up to accept her Oscar, she ate it. She managed to make it way less awkward by just sitting there for an extra five seconds.

In the biggest upset of the night, Ang Lee won the Oscar for Best Director for Life of Pi beating out the heavily favored Steven Spielberg for Lincoln.

Finally, as everyone expected, Argo won the Oscar for Best Picture which was half-presented by Michelle Obama for whatever reason. I’ll just use Joaquin Phoenix’s Oscar head shake to sum that up.

Oh yea and the celebrities looked real pretty while walking the red carpet.

The post The 2013 Oscars Recapped With Gifs appeared first on The Blemish.

Ethan Hawke is not a fan of the Oscars. He’s been nominated for two, Training Day (2001) and Before Sunset (2004), but he thinks they’re stupid anyway. Though this sounds more like he’s bitter that it’s been 9 years since he’s been nominated for one. Hawke tells the new issue of Gotham,

“People want to turn everything in this country into a competition . . . [so] it’s clear who the winner is and who the loser is.” The two-time nominee adds: “It’s why they like to announce the grosses of movies, because it’s a way of saying, ‘This one is No. 1.’ It’s so asinine . . . if you look at how many forgettable, stupid movies have won Oscars and how many mediocre performers have Oscars above their fireplace. Making a priority of chasing these fake carrots and money and dubious accolades, I think it’s really destructive.”

Totally. Competition ruins everything. Just look at the Olympics. Just a bunch of losers chasing a fake carrot. Everyone should just be content with who they are. Striving to be the best is so lame. Why do we have to rank everything anyway? Like why do we have to rank some actors as mediocre and some as great. Total bs. Amirite, Ethan?

The post Ethan Hawke Speaks Out Against the Oscars appeared first on The Blemish.

In recent years, Oscar nominee gift bags have become less and less exclusive. They’re still worth more than some people make in a year but ever since the government declared the $100,000+ bags taxable, celebrities have started not caring about them or even donating them to charity.

This year’s gift bags are valued at $45,000. Down $20,000 in value from the year before. Not only are they getting cheaper, but the gifts are getting weirder. They still have the $10,000 trips to Australia and skincare products worth hundreds of dollars each but now they also have condoms, a cheap book, maple syrup and circus training. What year is this, 1950? Via The Daily Beast, here are the stranger items in the gift bag.

-Take 2: Your Guide to Happy Endings and New Beginnings by Leeza Gibbons, a book about “starting over; taking inventory, and getting smarter, stronger, and sexier with no apologies, no regrets and no turning back.” ($24.00)

-A six-pack box of Naked brand condoms ($20.00)

-Maple syrup, from Rouge Maple Gourmet Products ($120.00)

-Portion-control dinnerware by Slimware: “Portion consciousness is disguised in the design.” ($59.00)

-A Vampire Facelift, a cosmetic procedure that involves re-injecting gel-like substances from the patient’s blood back into the skin of their face to treat wrinkles. ($5,000.00)

-Tickets to the circus, to see “North America’s only all-kid troupe.” ($400)

-Hair ties. But they double as bracelets! ($80.00)

-A lint roller by Gleener, called The Ultimate Fuzz Remover ($19.99)

-Windex touch-up cleaner ($3.99)

It’s like they needed fillers when the real stuff didn’t seem to be cutting it. This gift bag is almost to the point of free useless swag. By next year, the $10,000 trips will be gone and everything will be replaced by a floor map of the Oscars, lots of stickers, almost expired condoms and a Ninja Turtle action figure. I mean, tickets to train for the circus? You might as well hop on a train with a satchel tied to a stick.

The header image is an old gift bag.

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Here we have a supercut of all the Oscar winners for Best Picture since 1927′s Wings until now. Just in case you want a primer before tuning in to the 2013 Oscars so you finally get those insider jokes.

The post The Oscar Best Picture Supercut appeared first on The Blemish.

Oscar released his list of best movies/people in specific categories for this year’s Academy Awards. It’s full of films and actors you’d typically expect. You got your Lincoln (leading the race with 12 nominations) and Zero Dark Thirty for Best Picture. You got your Daniel Day-Lewis who’ll naturally win for Best Actor. Then there’s your Jessica Chastain and Christoph Waltz. And don’t forget the list of 5 animated pictures that came out this year all up for Best Animated Film. Then you have those other categories that no one cares about like production design. Boooring.

Best Picture
Beasts of the Southern Wild
Silver Linings Playbook
Zero Dark Thirty
Lincoln
Les Miserables
Life of Pi
Amour
Django Unchained
Argo

Best Actor
Daniel Day-Lewis, Lincoln
Denzel Washington, Flight
Hugh Jackman, Les Miserables
Bradley Cooper, Silver Linings Playbook
Joaquin Phoenix, The Master

Best Actress
Naomi Watts, The Impossible
Jessica Chastain, Zero Dark Thirty
Jennifer Lawrence, Silver Linings Playbook
Emmanuelle Riva, Amour
Quvenzhané Wallis, Beasts of the Southern Wild

Best Supporting Actor
Christoph Waltz, Django Unchained
Phillip Seymour Hoffman, The Master
Robert De Niro, Silver Linings Playbook
Alan Arkin, Argo
Tommy Lee Jones, Lincoln

Best Supporting Actress
Sally Field, Lincoln
Anne Hathaway, Les Miserables
Jacki Weaver, Silver Linings Playbook
Helen Hunt, The Sessions
Amy Adams, The Master

Best Original Song
“Before My Time,” Chasing Ice
“Pi’s Lullaby,” Life of Pi
“Suddenly,” Les Miserables
“Everybody Needs A Best Friend,” Ted
“Skyfall,” Skyfall

Best Animated Feature Film
Frankenweenie
Pirates! Band of Misfits
Wreck-It Ralph
Paranorman
Brave

Best Foreign Language Film
Austria: Amour
Chile: No
Canada: War Witch
Denmark: A Royal Affair
Norway: Kontiki

Best Director
David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook
Ang Lee, Life of Pi
Steven Spielberg, Lincoln
Michael Haneke, Amour
Benh Zeitlin, Beasts of the Southern Wild

Best Original Screenplay
John Gatins, Flight
Mark Boal, Zero Dark Thirty
Quentin Tarantino, Django Unchained
Michael Haneke, Amour
Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola, Moonrise Kingdom

Best Adapted Screenplay
Lucy Alibar and Benh Zeitlin, Beasts of the Southern Wild
Chris Terrio, Argo
Tony Kushner, Lincoln
David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook
David Magee, Life of Pi

Best Cinematography
Seamus McGarvey, Anna Karenina
Robert Richardson, Django Unchained
Claudio Miranda, Life of Pi
Janusz Kaminski, Lincoln
Roger Deakins, Skyfall

The post The 2013 Oscar Nominations are Out appeared first on The Blemish.

Oh, man. Sorry about that last Oscar arrivals post. They weren’t as star studded as I would have liked. Hopefully these arrivals at the 2012 Vanity Fair Oscar Party will make up for it.

If the people in that Oscar arrival post were strippers, they’d be working in Kansas at 2 in the afternoon. If the people in this post were like strippers, they’d be working in Vegas at 10 at night.

The post These Vanity Fair Oscar Party Arrivals are Better appeared first on The Blemish.

Update: More arrival photos added.

I know some of you like to see who wore what at the Oscars so here’s a bunch of celebrities arriving on the red carpet yesterday but let me save you some time on figuring it out. The guys whore tuxes and suits and the girls wore dresses.

The post The 84th Annual Academy Awards 2012 Arrivals appeared first on The Blemish.