The Blemish

Browsing: paris hilton

Boredom: Paris Hilton shoots Prosecco

December 19th, 20071 comment

If marketing’s goal was to make it so that next time I have a social gathering of shirtless men and an apathetic looking socialite, I’d think to buy Prosecco (the finest in canned champagne), then they have failed. If their goal was to make me shriek with laughter and follow it by uttering a sigh …

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Paris Hilton wants to adopt Smurfs

December 19th, 2007Respond

America has to deal with that moron Paris and now Russia gets to feels our pain. The hotel heiress was watching Russian dwarves in blue body paint promoting Haribo’s Smurf jelly sweets (?) when she decided it would be a good idea to talk down to them in a baby voice letting them know she …

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Morning time wasters

December 12th, 2007Respond

Pajiba: Good grief, Grace is Gone
AB: Pete Doherty: Guidance counselor
CNW: Posh Spice removed her implants
Hollywood Rag: Britney Spears to play the Virgin Mary

DRW: People still want upskirts of Paris Hilton (Site NSFW)
WIMB: Kylie Minogue gets kinky
JIYHB: Katherine Heigl likes to workout
Hollywood Tuna: Adriana Lima’s lips are red hot
Celebparasite: Rachel Ray doesn’t care about her weight, …

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Paris Hilton saves Oompa Loompas

December 11th, 20071 comment

Robin Sherwood, a little person, was performing as an Oompa Loompa in full makeup at Art Basel Miami Beach Saturday night when he was shoved into a metal stage support that sliced open his leg. No one noticed the guy was hurt except for Paris Hilton who went over to save him.
“Paris screamed for help …

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Britney writes Paris hate mail

December 6th, 2007Respond

The Daily Star claims Britney wants to blow Paris’ new sex secret because the socialite walked by Britney while she was celebrating her 26 birthday party and didn’t wish her a happy birthday. In a letter written to Paris, Britney threatens to release a One Night In Paris type sex tape on the web if …

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Paris Hilton has new lips

December 3rd, 20073 comments

I don’t get it. What’s so sexy about making your lips look like a prolapsed rectum?

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Paris Hilton wants babies

November 29th, 20072 comments

Not to be outshone by Nicole Richie’s ongoing pregnancy, Paris Hilton has let it be known that she too wants to spawn. You see, Paris wants her baby to be bff with Nicole’s baby just like when they were little. That way a new generation of idiots may take their place when their older and …

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Paris Hilton did her own makeup

November 12th, 20071 comment

Paris Hilton showed up at JJ Mahoney’s in Seoul with lipstick smeared over her teeth. This bimbo can’t do anything right. Look at her. So blissfully ignorant. She’s like a little porcelain doll created to teach little girls that objectifying women is a good thing and as long as you’re pretty — I guess this …

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