Massive amounts of Photoshop have finally made Eminem look like the living Ken Doll: White Rapper Version he’s always dreamed of being. With the marketing of the new Eminem Ken doll, no longer will only little white girls have something to look up to and play with, but so will little suburban white boys. So inspirational. And creepy.

They could have saved a lot of time if they just held an open casting call for a brunette who somewhat resembles Kelly Clarkson and isn’t fat. I bet when artists showed the photos to Kelly for final approval, she looked up from her bucket of KFC and started crying.