When bikini pics of LeAnn Rimes in Mexico came out, everyone just went, “Hey, nice implants.” No big deal. Girls get boob jobs all the time and it’s great. Fantastic even.

The problem with these tits though is that she got them from the same surgeon who did Eddie Cibrian’s ex wife Brandi Glanville’s breasts. Even more awkward, LeAnn got the same cup size as Brandi.

“She recently got a boob job,” a source reveals to UsMagazine.com. “She’s always, always been insecure about her size. She was a small A-cup. She often talked about wanting to get implants. She’d say, “I just want a little bit so they’re proportionate to my body.’”

To pump up her new appearance, Rimes even turned to the same plastic surgeon Cibrian’s ex wife Brandi Glanville used — and got the same cup size!

Says the insider, “When Brandi and LeAnn were constantly fighting, one of LeAnn’s jabs at Brandi was that she was plastic. Brandi replied, ‘Be careful, honey. That’s what Eddie likes. You’ll be there someday too.’ Looks like Brandi was right!”

Eddie Cibrian is creepy. If he wasn’t moderately famous, he’d probably be dressing up mannequins into the image of his ideal wife. He might still be famous, however, but this time under the headline, “Police find bodies of four dead hookers in man’s apartment.”

Nine months ago, Heidi Montag underwent 10 plastic surgeries in one day. One of the procedures she had done was to pump her breasts up to a G-cup. Now, Heidi wants them out. Sad face.

Heidi tells Life & Style that “I’m desperate to go back to normal. I’m downgrading and going a little smaller, to a D or a double D.” She complains that her boobs are crushing her. “I have major anxiety about it. I was taking painkillers but they weren’t working so I stopped. It hurt either way.”

Her gigantic breasts make even normal day tasks difficult. For example, Heidi can’t hug her four dogs, wear anything but custom-made clothes or work out.

Heidi feels trapped in her own body and is currently shopping for a surgeon in South America, but she isn’t sure she’ll ever get out of her cartoonish body because the guy who did the surgery died in a car accident last week. “There’s just no fixing it,” she says. “Dr. Ryan knows the work he did, he knows everything.”

Aww, poor baby. We should all feel sorry for Heidi because she can’t live a normal life after choosing to get G-cups. She’s like those kids with cleft palates or that woman who got her face torn off by a chimpanzee. Just a victim of circumstance.

Are we supposed to feel even more sorry for her when she comes back from South America with two uneven tits? The only reason she’s going to go to South America is because she’s broke and over there she can barter one of her kidneys for the surgery. She might as well have someone in the states repeatedly punch her breasts until her chest flattens down to a DD because that’s the exact same thing they’re going to do there.

A plastic surgeon said Fergie’s body was the most requested by his patients. Gisele Bundchen and Olivia Wilde were the next two. Clearly this guy is insane. There’s no way I’d want Fergie’s body if I was a chick. I’d rather have my head transplanted onto a bear. Is he sure they didn’t mean Bar Refaeli? Maybe they just couldn’t pronounce her name? [Fox 411]

New scans from the issue of PEOPLE magazine in which they document Heidi Montag’s transformation into an unrecognizable Heidi 3.0 are now available via ONTD. The procedures Heidi had done are as follows: mini brow lift, botox in forehead and frown area, nose job revision, fat injection in cheeks, nasolabial folds and lips, chin reduction, neck liposuction, ears pinned back, breast augmentation revision, liposuction on waist, hips and inner and outer thighs and buttock augmentation.

And here are a list of procedures Spencer Pratt had done: removal of permanent smile caused by thoughts of money from the publicity and removal of dollar signs from eyes.

Obviously suffering from self-esteem issues, Heidi says this was her way of dealing with her insecurity and the pressures of Hollywood. She also says this is this is the first step in realizing her dream of becoming a pop superstar like Britney Spears was in her prime. Either she’s delusional or the meds haven’t worn off because there’s no way these surgeries had any dramatic effect on her. She just looks different and a tiny bit like Kristy Swanson. Not better, not worse. It’s like trading in a gray jacket for a black jacket.

In the new issue of PEOPLE, Heidi Montag, 23, reveals that she’s addicted to plastic surgery. In a bid to be “the best me”,  Heidi decided to get sliced up for a second time and have 10 plastic-surgery procedures done in one day. The attention whore whines, “For the past three years, I’ve thought about what to have done. I’m beyond obsessed.” The procedures were done on November 20 and not even her family knew what was going on, but she chronicled every moment of recovery.

Heidi is said to have had a breast enlargement, chin reduction, a nose job, liposuction and more. She says she’s not done yet either. God. How desperate is this bitch that she has to put more plastic in her and keep a journal about it just to get the cover of PEOPLE. I can just imagine Heidi jotting down “Day 4: It hurts,” in her journal while she cackles through her bandaged-up face like Darkman.

In a “no shit” moment, Howard Stern asked Denise Richards on his Sirius show if her breasts were real. Can you guess what the answer was? Ding, ding, ding. They’re fake. In fact, they’re fake three times over.

Denise told Stern that the first time she had them done was when she was 19. Jealous of her roommates perfect boobs, Denise went to the doctor and told him to work his magic.

Her breasts ended up too big for her body so she went for a second operation. Turns out she wasn’t very bright back then either and forgot to tell him to put in smaller ones. She ended up with D’s.

The third time she went in, they finally got it right.

“I was young and should have researched better. You know, it was a big mistake. Young girls, don’t do it!”

As far as life plans go, getting skinny, buying big fake tits, going to Hollywood and profiting wasn’t a bad one. She may have lost all her dignity and respect, but look at her now. She has her own reality show, failed marriage and has to exploit herself and her children just to maintain the extravagant lifestyle she’s grown accustomed to. I bet she has to calm herself down every night to fall asleep.

Refusing to age gracefully, Rupert Everett decided to get a little plastic surgery and by a little, I mean he completely replaced his face. Star explains:

According to Dr. Brian S. Glatt, founder of the Premier Plastic Surgery Center of New Jersey, Rupert, 49, has had a comprehensive series of facial procedures. “I think Rupert had a face-lift,” Dr. Glatt tells Star. “His cheeks are fuller and lifted, and his jawline and neck are pulled back and smoother.”

As for his forehead, Dr. Glatt says it’s simply Botox. “I think he’s definitely using it. He is very animated, and there are no lines visible on his forehead.”

The last element in Rupert’s new look, says Dr. Glatt, is a chin implant! “The shape and projection of the chin is drastically different. It’s much more pointed,” he says.

His expression probably never changes which makes sex extremely creepy. Girls (guys in this case) tend to freak out when the guy they’re doing has a perma-smile on their face. They either think that A) they died or B) they’re a serial killer. As I’ve been told, neither of those are favorable choices.

11 days ago, Usher’s wife, Tameka Foster Raymond, suffered a heart attack while being anesthetized prior to a “simple liposuction” in Sao Rafael Hospital in Brazil. She was revived with heart massage and put into an induced coma before being transferred to the better equipped Sirio-Libanes hospital. Today, she checked out.

It is believed that the reason for the cardiac arrest was due to the fact Tameka lied and said she had a child four months ago when in fact she had one two months ago. Patients normally need to wait six to eight months after childbirth before surgeons suck the fat out of them.

I hope they finished the surgery. It’d be a shame to go all that way and not finish the lipo. At the very least, doctors should have given her a t-shirt that read, “I went to Brazil and all I got was a heart attack and an induced coma.” That way it wouldn’t be a total loss.

Tameka Foster, Usher’s wife, is in stable condition following complications suffered during “routine surgery” in Brazil. Usher canceled his pre-Grammy performance to fly to Tameka’s bedside. The “routine surgery” was some type of plastic surgery (cough*vaginalreconstruction*cough).

Note that this wasn’t done in the US. This was done in Brazil. A place where the rules are a little less strict. You could ask them to sew you a three-headed hell hound if you wanted. An operation the holier than thou doctors in America call unethical. Obviously they don’t realize how awesome and menacing a three-headed Rottweiler could be. I was going to name it “Frickin’ Sweet.” I had the dog tag printed and everything.

At least she never has to dress up for Halloween. That’s something. Right? Guys? Why are you running? You training for a marathon?

Brazilian actress/model Sheyla Hershey had a dream. A dream to have the world’s biggest breasts. It was this dream that led her to Houston, Texas. There, surgeons pumped a gallon of silicone in her chest (literally) inflating it to a 34FFF. Still, that wasn’t enough. Hershey wanted to go bigger.

Her probably gay boyfriend pleaded with her to stop so she wisely dumped him. The state of Texas told her that injecting any more than a gallon of silicone would violate their ethical code or something like that. So, she went to a country where doctors weren’t such big babies. Brazil. Sheyla finally ended up with a 38KKK bust and now holds the record for world’s largest breasts.

Being Brazil, Sheyla was also given the option of fusing a live koala to her back. Sadly, she decided against it.

Hat tip to Cornhole. More photos here.

Scientists believe that leaving a trail of breadcrumbs is the best way to make a Nikki Cox follow you home. Also, it is best to do this during the summer months as she is likely to make her way South when temperatures begin to drop.