Neil Strauss, reporter, interviewer and author of The Game, has a new book coming out titled Everyone Loves You When You’re Dead which reveals shocking moments with his interview subjects. For example, Lady Gaga once cried over her ex, Courtney Love once considered snorting Kurt Cobain’s ashes and Paris Hilton once had breast implants at 14 which her mom made her remove.

The latest shocking reveal posted by LA Weekly from the book is another one about Paris Hilton. This one about how she’s a closet racist and hates black people. Not surprising considering the leaked videos that came out years ago but this time it’s straight from Paris Hilton’s mouth.

Hilton: I went out with that guy last night.
Strauss: Which guy?
Hilton: (points to an actor in Saving Private Ryan): We were making out, but then we went somewhere where it was bright and I saw that he was black and made an excuse and left. I can’t stand black guys. I would never touch one. It’s gross. (pauses). Does that guy look black to you?
Strauss: How black does a guy have to be?
Hilton: One percent is enough for me.

She was probably talking about Vin Diesel since he’s the only white looking half black guy I can think of in Saving Private Ryan unless Edward Burns has been keeping something from us.

Regardless, she and Halle Berry have a lot in common. They both believe in the one-drop rule. You should tell Paris that she and Halle are a lot alike. I bet that’ll make her real happy.

Halle Berry and Gabriel Aubry’s messy custody battle is getting even messier. Aubry’s former business partner Stephane Bibeau is siding with mommy on this one and tells PEOPLE, “Once they broke up he became verbally threatening to Halle. He is a vindictive guy.” Bibeau and other sources claim Aubry also hurled a racial slur at her.

TMZ adds on to the report saying Gabriel called Halle the “N” word (nagger?) and constantly called her other names like “f**king bitch” as well as sent her text messages using the same language. Probably just in case she forgot what he said. A source told TMZ, “He constantly demeaned her. It was awful.”

Saying Gabriel dropped “N” bombs elicits more gasps than accusing him of kicking his baby. Gabriel might as well tap out and hand the kid over at this point.

In an interview with the Guardian UK, Morrissey had an opinion on everything and if you read the title, you can guess that none of it was positive.

Morrissey on other singers: “They have two or three melodies and they repeat them ad nauseam over the course of 28 albums.”

Morrissey on people: “They are problems.”

Morrissey on the charts: “Nothing any more to do with talent or gift or cleverness or originality. Every new artist flies in at number one, but in terms of live music they couldn’t fill a telephone box.”

Morrissey on if he owns a valid driver’s license: “What kind of bland, insipid question is that?”

Morrissey on the Chinese: “Did you see the thing on the news about their treatment of animals and animal welfare? Absolutely horrific. You can’t help but feel that the Chinese are a subspecies.”

A spokesman for Love Music Hate Racism, to which Morrissey donated to in 2008, said, “It is crude racism. When you start using language like ‘sub-species’, you are entering into dark and murky water.”

It’s great Morrissey sees the actions of a few and attributes it to an entire race because that’s exactly what I do. Sweeping generalizations make it so I don’t have to think so hard and therefore make my brain hurt less. You look at celebrities like Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan and you just know all celebrities are whores. Like that Dakota Fanning . She must be a raging slut.

Toby Keith pulled a Miley Cyrus during an impromptu concert in which Will Smith sang Rapper’s Delight. While Will rapped, “to the black, to the white, the red and the brown, the purple and yellow,” Toby made the slant-eye gesture to emphasize that Will meant Asian people when he said “yellow”, not a lemon or anything like that. Toby was just trying to clear things up. Turns out people took offense to Toby being so helpful. Especially since he was in Norway for the Nobel Peace Prize Concert.

Now reps for Asian American groups are calling Toby out. The Asian American Justice Center said, “Toby Keith embarrassed himself and his country, denigrated the Noble Peace Prize and offended Asians and Asian Americans by using a crude, racist hand gesture.” While the Media Action Network for Asians said, “By doing this, he is telling his Asian fans ‘you don’t matter, you’re not on my radar.’”

Reps for Keith responded, “nobody at the party thought Toby was out of line.” But instead of “line” they probably said “rine” and then pointed to someone who looked Asian and laughed.

If Toby was so big into hand gestures, I wonder why when Will said “brown”, Toby didn’t yell, “For Allah!” or when he said “red”, he didn’t do the tomahawk chop and put five fingers behind his head to signify feathers or when Will said “black,” Toby didn’t smash his lips together so they’d look real big and swollen. Wait, I think I know the answer to the last one. It might have been because he would have gotten his ass kicked by the people behind him.

A nutjob in LA has filed a $4 billion class action lawsuit against Miley Cyrus. Lucie J. Kim claims Miley purposely mocked Asians by slanting her eyes and that the 1 million+ Asian Pacific Islanders she supposedly represents in L.A. county are entitled to $4,000 each in damages for a civil rights violation. TMZ explains:

Kim claims when Cyrus posed for the photo, she “knew or should have known that her image would be publicly disseminated via the media, which Cyrus knew focused on her private life, specifically TMZ.”

Kim says Miley’s “just a kid” defense doesn’t fly. She says it’s like Paris Hilton claiming to be just a kid. Ouch.

Everyone agrees that Miley Cyrus was just doing dumb things teenagers do and that scolding her wasn’t only justified, but extremely entertaining. This, however, is going a little too far. It’s the equivalent of being taunted at school and then suing the bully when all you have to do is kick him in the balls. So why don’t they just let Lucie J. Kim and the people she represents do that? Have them all kick Miley in the box if it’ll make them feel better. Anything to put an end to this retarded lawsuit.

Wait. What the. Is she doing that face again? That bitch.

Miley Cyrus has finally issued a new apology for those anti-Asian photos that circulated around the internets. The first one attempted to brush it off as just her and friends making “goofy faces.” Teenage hijinks as it were. Activists weren’t too thrilled with that. So, she’s returned to the world’s most annoying pink/purple website to apologize for reals.

“I want to thank all of my fans for their support not only this week, but always! I really wanted to stress how sorry I am if the photo of me with my friends offended anyone. I have learned a valuable lesson from this and know that sometimes my actions can be unintentionally hurtful. I know everything is part of God’s ultimate plan, and mistakes happen so that eventually I will become the woman He aspires me to be. Peace and love, Miles.”

Well, the most important thing is she managed not to insult any more people. Going by how her previous apology went, I expected this one to end with, “Me so solly.”

Miley Cyrus took to her blog located at the world’s most annoying website to discuss that photo of her and her friends doing the slant-eye pose. Miley explained that this wasn’t mockery. This was a photo taken out of context. They were only making “goofy” faces. Because that’s what Asians have. Goofy faces.

In NO way was I making fun of any ethnicity! I was simply making goofy faces.

When did that become newsworthy? It seems someone is trying to make something out of nothing to me. If that would of been anyone else, it would of been overlooked! I definitely feel like the press is trying to make me out as the new ‘BAD GIRL’!

I feel like now that Britney
is back on top of her game again, they need someone to pick on! Lucky me! haha Anyway, I just wanted to let you guys know what is on my heart. You guys know me and have been by my side every step of the way!

You guys know my heart and know the most important things to me are my friends, family, fans, and GOD! In NO WAY do I want to disappoint any of you! But, when I have made mistakes in the past, I feel like Ive owned up to them and apologized.

That hole Miley just dug for herself looks really deep. How far do you think it goes? Seven, eight feet? Hey, does anybody else hear an echo?

Granted, I still think the blame should lie with her parents. If they let Miley watch quality programming like Animaniacs or Tiny Toons instead of taped Bugs Bunny cartoons from the 1940′s, this probably wouldn’t have happened.

Emulating the Spanish Olympic basketball team, the Spanish Olympic tennis team and Argentina’s Olympic women’s soccer team, Miley Cyrus pulled back her eyelids and offended a few billion people.

What might have been originally meant as abject mockery of the lone Asian in their group, has caused furor at the OCA, a group “dedicated to advancing the social, political and economic well-being of Asian Pacific Americans.” They issued this statement:

The photograph of Miley Cyrus and other individuals slanting their eyes currently circulating the Internet is offensive to the Asian Pacific American community and sets a terrible example for her many young fans. This image falls within a long and unfortunate history of people mocking and denigrating individuals of Asian descent…

…Not only has Miley Cyrus and the other individuals in the photograph encouraged and legitimized the taunting and mocking of people of Asian descent, she has also insulted her many Asian Pacific American fans, said George Wu, executive director of OCA. The inclusion of an Asian Pacific American individual in the photo does not make it acceptable.

OCA hopes that Miley Cyrus will apologize to her fans and the APA community for this lapse in judgment and takes the opportunity to better understand why the gesture is offensive.”

Doesn’t the OCA know the unwritten rule that it’s not racist as long as you have a friend who belongs to the minority you’re making fun of or that one person from said minority declares that they’re not offended? Clearly, that’s the case here. Anyway, Miley can’t be racist. Some of her best friends are Asian, like, the guy who works at the Chinese restaurant she always orders from and what’s-his-name from that picture going around the web. Yea, that funny looking kid not pulling back his eyes. They’re total BFF’s.

What started as a simple remark to promote Spike Lee’s new WWII movie, Miracle at St. Anna, has turned into an even better promotion. Today, Spike Lee gave his response to Clint Eastwood’s suggestion that he should “shut his face.” Spike tells ABC News:

“First of all, the man is not my father and we’re not on a plantation either. He’s a great director. He makes his films, I make my films. The thing about it though, I didn’t personally attack him. And a comment like ‘a guy like that should shut his face’ — come on Clint, come on. He sounds like an angry old man right there.”

“If he wishes, I could assemble African-American men who fought at Iwo Jima and I’d like him to tell these guys that what they did was insignificant and they did not exist,” he said. “I’m not making this up. I know history. I’m a student of history. And I know the history of Hollywood and its omission of the one million African-American men and women who contributed to World War II.”

Then again, maybe Clint Eastwood misinterpreted his comments.

“I never said he should show one of the other guys holding up the flag as black. I said that African-Americans played a significant part in Iwo Jima,” he said. “For him to insinuate that I’m rewriting history and have one of the four guys with the flag be black … no one said that. It’s just that there’s not one black in either film. And because I know my history, that’s why I made that observation.”

They should just hug and get it over with. Maybe even give each other a fist pound. After all, fist pounding is the new hugging. They can even be cutesy about it. You know how sometimes you see young kids try to teach old white men urban handshakes, but the old guy messes up and they both laugh resulting in sort of shared “moment”? Spike Lee and Clint Eastwood should do that.

[Spike Lee at Cannes 2008. Image via Splash News]

Clint Eastwood fired back at Spike Lee who earlier criticized Clint for not including black soldiers in Flags of Our Fathers and Letters From Iwo Jima, telling the Malcolm X director to “shut his face.” At a press conference at Cannes to promote his own war film, Maracle at St. Anna, Spike commented:

“Clint Eastwood made two films about Iwo Jima that ran for more than four hours total, and there was not one Negro actor on the screen,” Lee said. “If you reporters had any balls you’d ask him why. There’s no way I know why he did that … But I know it was pointed out to him and that he could have changed it. It’s not like he didn’t know.”

Apparently, one of those reporters had the balls because they asked Clint to which he responded.

“The story is Flags of Our Fathers, the famous flag-raising picture, and they didn’t do that. If I go ahead and put an African-American actor in there, people’d go: ‘This guy’s lost his mind.’ I mean, it’s not accurate.” Referring to Lee, he added: “A guy like him should shut his face.”

If you think Clint will stop there, think again.

Defending the racial make-up in his films as historically accurate, Eastwood referred to another of his films, Changeling, which was set in Los Angeles before the city had a large group of African-Americans. “What are you going to do, you going to tell a fuckin’ story about that?” he said. “Make it look like a commercial for an equal opportunity player? I’m not in that game. I’m playing it the way I read it historically, and that’s the way it is. When I do a movie and it’s 90% black, like Bird, then I use 90% black people.

“He was complaining when I did Bird (the 1988 biopic of Charlie Parker). Why would a white guy be doing that? I was the only guy who made it, that’s why. He could have gone ahead and made it. Instead he was making something else.”

Based on this evidence, Spike Lee has a good chance of being shot if he ever steps onto Clint Eastwood’s property and it won’t be because he’s black, as he’ll most likely claim, it’ll be because he’s annoying. Oh, hold on a second. I just received a special message from Clint which he wants me to relay to Spike. Clint has cordially invited you to lunch to discuss this issue in depth. Be there at 2 a.m. sharp and bring no witnesses. Er, I mean RSVP. Heh heh heh.

[Clint Eastwood arriving for The Spirit of Independence Awards which he won. Image via Splash News]