On Tuesday, news broke that The Situation had entered rehab. His rep was quick to deny the reports claiming Mike Sorrentino was merely at an undisclosed location resting and recuperating.

On Wednesday, a message was posted on The Situation’s website (which is a straight rip of Gawker) attempting to clear up all these rumors that “have been falsely reporting stories about The Situation being in rehab.” You see, The Situation isn’t in rehab. He’s just recuperating from a prescription medication addiction brought about by exhaustion. Hey, sort of like Jason Russell.

I want to set the record straight. I have voluntarily taken steps to get control of a prescription medication problem I had due to exhaustion. I have spent the past several weeks getting treatment for this problem and recuperating from my work and appearance schedule. I appreciate my fans support and love you guys. Sitch News

So he’s in rehab. Gotcha. In fact, he’s rehabbing at the famed Cirque Lodge in Utah. He’s also using the “do you know who I am?” line to get the chef to cook according to his diet because he’s bloated and needs to get back into shape for season 6 of Jersey Shore. Sitch must think no one wants to see his fat ass walking around shoveling Oxycontin into his mouth. I’m here to tell Sitch that he’s very very wrong.

TMZ has learned that the party is over for The Situation. At least until he leaves rehab for his substance abuse issues. Luckily, Season 6 of Jersey Shore will only start filming in summer.

A rep for Mike Sorrentino did not confirm the report but said he “has spent the past several weeks at an undisclosed location for much needed rest and recuperation after his extensive production and appearance schedule.”

Seeing as how Situation isn’t a black ops agent, the only type of people who can stay at undisclosed locations, this is pretty much a confirmation that he went to rehab.

No word on what substance he was abusing but if you ask Snooki and JWoww, they would probably tell you it was “cock.”

Gerard Butler has plowed through most of Hollywood, so you’d think he checked into rehab for sex addiction, but no, Butler actually checked in to the Betty Ford Center for substance abuse.

TMZ says Butler’s problems started due to the physical demands of shooting 300 in 2006 which caused him to struggle with pain management. The problem worsened while filming Of Men and Mavericks when Butler was injured in December during a surfing accident.

Butler saw he was relying too much on Rx meds, and he also developed a bit of a coke problem, so he went into rehab three weeks ago. Sources say he’ll be leaving Betty Ford later this Friday.

Ah, it all makes sense now. No wonder whenever Gerard was near any powdery white substance, he screamed, “GIVE IT! GIVE IT TO ME!,” and started loudly snorting the air. The baking isle at Vons had never been so terrifying.

Heather Locklear secretly entered rehab after her split with Jack Wagner back in November. It didn’t quite work as the split eventually led to her getting physical with Jack Wagner, stealing his dog and mixing prescription medication and alcohol.

“Heather has been out of control for many years,” a source tells the new issue of Us Weekly (out now). “Her drinking has caused her to fall out of many friendships.

“She doesn’t get out of bed most days,” the source explains, adding that “Jack kept her on the straight and narrow, but he couldn’t keep Heather sober.”

Though Wagner, 52, “begged her to go to rehab,” it wasn’t until after their breakup that Locklear “entered a treatment program, which her family was able to keep quiet.”

Unfortunately, the former Melrose Place actress, 50, “didn’t take it seriously” and appeared visibly drunk at an L.A. Lakers game January 10. Us Weekly

Of course Heather Locklear didn’t take it seriously. How can anyone take anything seriously without a nightly Ambien/Vodka tonic? What is this? Rehab or a concentration camp?

Hey, guys. It’s the moment you’ve all been waiting for. It’s professional nipple slipper Bai Ling’s newest single, “Rehab” and it’s not a cover of Amy Winehouse. I’d like to believe it’s more of an homage.

If you’ve ever wondered what angels sound like when they sing, listen to this. I had no idea one could fall in love with music. Until now. This has the vocal styling of 100 Adele’s. If you shoved thumbtacks and shards of glass down her throat and forced her to sing at gunpoint. My ears managed to vomit. [via Dlisted]

PEOPLE confirms that Whitney Houston needs help. The 47-year-old has checked into an out-patient rehab program for drugs and alcohol. Whitney’s rep continues, “Whitney voluntarily entered the program to support her long-standing recovery process.” A source tells TMZ that “she’s cleansing herself to get ready for a new movie.”

The program lets Whitney go out in public but she has to bring a monitor. Basically, she’s paying someone to be her mother. The good news is nagging comes free of charge.

In an article for Seventeen Magazine, Demi Lovato revealed that she wasn’t in rehab for anger issues but for an eating disorder. Eating disorders always get such a bad rap. Demi said,

“I wish I could tell every young girl with an eating disorder, or who has harmed herself in any way, that she’s worthy of life and that her life has meaning. You can overcome and get through anything. Yes, there have been times when I definitely have been tempted to get rid of my dinner. But I will deal with it for the rest of my life because it’s a life-long disease. I don’t think there’s going to be a day when I don’t think about food or my body, but I’m living with it, and I wish I could tell young girls to find their safe place and stay with it.”

“If you are going through that dark period, go to your family and closest friends. Don’t put yourself in danger. It’s very crucial that you get your feelings out – but don’t ever inflict harm on your own body because your body is so sacred.”

“I don’t let anyone’s insecurities, emotions, or opinions bother me. I know that if I am happy, that’s all that matters to me. And it’s OK to be selfish like that sometimes, when it comes to your well-being. Do what makes you happy, and don’t care what others think.”

How overwhelmingly positive. If I could feel and if I was a little girl, I’d be inspired and touched but I’m not. I’m a guy with a blackened heart so whatever little piggy. Take your healthy attitude somewhere else. Like the buffet line.

Sean William Scott has checked himself into a treatment center for “health and personal issues.”

Scott’s rep released a statement simply saying, “Sean William Scott has voluntarily admitted himself for proactive treatment to address health and personal issues. He appreciates the support of his many fans at this time.” So basically what I just said but in fancier words.

Not even TMZ knows what Scott’s issues are and they pay people for information. However, if I had to guess, it’s to deal with the fact that he hasn’t had a hit movie in years and will sadly be forever known as Stifler no matter how many tattoos he gets. Granted, Role Models was pretty good. I’ll give him that.

A big fuss was made about sending Charlie Sheen to rehab and getting help. It seems after much cajoling his friends finally got through to him. Sort of.

TMZ says Charlie Sheen won’t go to a rehab facility but will instead have an addiction expert come to his house to help him out. Charlie’s people claim it’s for privacy reasons. Also because none of the rehab facilities Charlie checked out allowed porn stars and blow. Something about relapse and feeding his addiction. You know. A lot of medical mumbo jumbo.

According to TMZ, Charlie Sheen is slated to be in rehab for three months leaving the 300-strong crew of Two and a Half Men pissed that they’ll be out of work for the next 12 weeks. Sources inside production say last time Charlie was in rehab, the crew was partially paid, but no decision has been made about what to do this time.

The crew might not have to worry for long, however. A friend tells Popeater that “if ratings go through the roof again, as they did after Charlie’s incident in New York, CBS and Charlie will be out again in no time and back to his old ways. However, if the public finally stops rewarding Charlie for his bad behavior, then, and only then, can you expect him to take the situation seriously.” That’s because on top of Charlie’s $1.25m per episode salary, Sheen gets a bonus if the show does well (MOAR porn stars and blow!). Essentially, what the friend is saying is we should stop giving Charlie Sheen positive reinforcement. Yea, I know. Crazy talk!

Although, even more motivation for CBS to get Charlie out of rehab is the potential $250 million in lost domestic syndication revenue. They only have two completed episodes and a hiatus will cost Warner Bros. Television millions in syndication and CBS millions in lost ad revenue.

But CBS says they’re not worried. They say they have multiple hit shows and the lost revenue will be offset by the reduced programming costs for episodes lost. Oh, so the crew might not be paid? Thanks, Charlie Sheen. Expect a lot of “get well” bundt cakes filled with razor blades to show up at your rehab center.

Speaking of rehab. Demi Lovato finished hers. Following three months of inpatient treatment after punching one of her backup dancers, 18-year-old Demi is finally ready for the real world.

“Demi came back to LA earlier this week,” the source tells Celebuzz. “She completed her prescribed treatment and an outpatient program near the treatment facility.”

The source says that Demi will “focus first and foremost on her well-being” but that she will “continue to see doctors in LA who will help her work on the issues she confronted in treatment.”

“She is so grateful to all of her fans for their unbelievable support,” says the source, “and looks forward to being able to talk to all of them very soon.”

Oh good. Now she can keep making music I’ll never listen to and star in films I’ll never watch. This is the best thing to happen to me since I found that sock behind my dryer.

Hell hath frozen over. Charlie Sheen finally checked into rehab again. From Us:

Charlie Sheen has voluntarily entered an undisclosed rehabilitation center today. He is most grateful to all who have expressed their concern.”

The suits at CBS reluctantly issued a statement expressing concern for his health and well-being but how much do you want to bet they were seething on the inside at having to put the show on hiatus.

“Due to Charlie Sheen’s decision to enter a rehabilitation center, CBS, Warner Bros. Television and executive producer Chuck Lorre are placing Two and a Half Men on production hiatus,” a statement released today said. “We are profoundly concerned for his health and well-being, and support his decision.”

Two weeks in rehab and Charlie is going to go back to his old ways. Just like Lindsay Lohan. The only reason he went is to get people off his back. It’s like when you begrudgingly give in to your mom nagging you about cleaning the dishes but you only half-ass it leaving pieces of food still caked onto the plates.

During the beginning of his 36-hour binge, Sheen brought his realtor and porn star friends to have dinner with his neighbor George Santo Pietro, Vanna White’s ex-husband.

Sheen got plastered and started talking about renting out George’s estate for $250,000 a month while he vacationed in Thailand. He wanted to turn George’s mansion into a housing project for his favorite porn stars. Basically, his own Playboy mansion. His people found out about the deal and slapped him silly and put a stop to it. Oh, well. At least Charlie still had a plan B. Go on a bender.

One of the porn stars says Sheen was smoking cocaine and critiquing porn before his neighbors, Real Housewives of Beverly Hills stars Dr. Paul Nassif and Adrienne Maloof-Nassif, called 911.

According to TMZ, after a briefcase of cocaine was delivered to his house, Charlie whipped out his small green pipe and started smoking coke for hours. He ended up in his theater room with all the porn stars and watched 3 hours of porn while critiquing the action. The porn star was said to be “surprised” by how much Charlie knew.

In related news, Charlie’s dad, Martin Sheen, wants him to go back to rehab. To which Charlie replied, “Hahahahhahahahah,” deep breath, “hahahahhahahha.” Charlie then threw a used condom at his face, gave the old man the finger and rode away on a rickshaw pulled by a couple of porn stars.