Last month, Richie Sambora was pulled over when cops noticed him driving erratically in a Hummer with his 10-year-old daughter Ava in the car. Richie blew a .13, .05 over the legal limit. The Laguna Beach PD recommended he be charged with child endangerment.

On Tuesday, Richie Sambora pled no contest. The DUI was dismissed and prosecutors decided not to file child endangerment charges. TMZ says “the rank and file cops felt the evidence didn’t support the charge.” Instead, he will pay around $1,600 in fees, be put on three years informal probation and attend a mandatory alcohol education course. They also ordered him to deflower five virgins which will be provided by the county and then the judge read a poem he wrote for Richie and blew him kisses as he exited the courtroom.

Richie Sambora was pulled over at 11:00 p.m. last night in Laguna Beach, California and arrested for driving under the influence. Police noticed him “driving erratically in a black Hummer” and state that he “failed numerous field sobriety tests”. Once at the station, Sambora requested a blood test rather than the usual breathalyzer.

Most of you will wonder, “Who’s this Richie Sambora?” To that, I will look at you with righteous indignation and matter of factly state, “I don’t know. I think he’s a musician who used to date Denise Richards or something. Remember her? She had a threesome in Wild Things. That was totally awesome. High five!”

Update: The dumbass had his kid Ava in the car and another minor. He could be charged for endangering children.