At a Robbie Williams’ concert in Germany, a crazed fan, possibly Flash Gordon judging by his speed, ran on stage and, adamant that this wasn’t the real Robbie Williams, pushed him off. The best part is when his band members chase the guy instead of checking if Robbie broke his neck. It’s what I tell my friends to do if I get shot. Find the guy, then pummel him while I bleed out. Oh, don’t worry about me, I have a band-aid in my pocket. I’m sure that gaping hole in my abdomen will be fine once I get this thing on. Luckily — or unluckily — Robbie ended up with only a scraped knee.

On second thought, I take that back. The best part is when he makes a speech about it in the dressing room and then almost cries at the end because he’s a pussy genuinely scared.

This is from 2001 and is really old. I’m going retro today!

Singer Robbie Williams and neighbor Joe Pesci got into an argument when one of Robbie’s friends blocked Pesci’s driveway with his car. Pesci stormed over to Robbie and pals wielding a golf club. The “Goodfellas” actor shouted,

“Which one of you motherfuckers blocked my drive? If you don’t move in 30 seconds, I’m gonna smash your windscreen!”

“At first, Rob stood there smirking when Pesci bounded over waving a club. But he quickly realised the seriousness of the situation and ordered his pals to move their cars.”

Joe Pesci is 5’4”, legally making him a smurf. And if a smurf ran at me with a golf club threatening to smash my windshield, I’d be like a deer in headlights. Do I punt him or do I pat his head and go, “Aww, how cute”? Decisions, decisions.

• Alessandra Ambrosio visits club Hyde. [Bastardly]
• Baby panda sneeze shakes the world. [CityRag]
• Donald Trump can’t stop bashing Rosie. [Glitterati]
• The Academy snubbed Eddie Murphy as payback? [Celebitchy]

• A Blades of Glory contest. [Evil Beet]
• Celebrity drug quotes. [Celebrity Smack]
• More Ana Beatriz Barros. [Grumpiest]
• Robbie Williams brings new meaning to chain smoking. [SOW]

• Mischa Barton parties till she pukes. [HB]
• The future Beckham castle. [NinjaDude]
• An alien brother on the way? [Celebslam]
• Kerri Kasem is still around? [DH]
• The tossing acid lady. [CH]

I wanted Tara Reid to sing you the news. This is as close as I could get. Listen to Tara’s angelic voice as she coos Total Eclipse of My Heart while you peruse some headlines.

• Arnold Schwarzenegger’s funniest moments. [CityRag]
• Gisele Bundchen does Korean based tug. [Bastardly]
• More Spider-Man 3 video. [Celebitchy]
• Robbie Williams leaves rehab early. [SOW]

• Sting in Hello! [Glitterati]
• Lance Bass writes brilliantly titled memoir. [Evil Beet]
• You can pay Michael Jackson to be your friend. [About]
• Some guy from The Hills goes to jail. [Yeeeah]

• Simon Cowell doesn’t care about Britney Spears. [HB]
• Rachel Ray attacked by dog. [NinjaDude]
• Chris Daughtry in LIFE magazine. [Celebrity Smack]
• You can touch Anne Hathaway’s breasts. [Egotastic]