NHL star Sean Avery, who once dated Elisha Cuthbert (hence the header pic), challenged cops to a fight this morning and called them “fat little pigs.” Wait, has he been hanging out with Alec Baldwin?

Police responded to Avery’s Hollywood Hills home this morning over a noise complaint. Right away Avery said he’d fight them all and told them to “Come back without your badges.” Avery also allegedly shoved a cop and slammed the door on them.

Turns out that’s not a good way to get rid of cops because they began to tell Avery that if he didn’t open up, they’d break the door down. Avery then began cooperating. He was booked for battering a peace officer and released on bail this morning.

Avery sounds like a tough guy. Unless he can only fight on skates and has to put on a pair of rollerblades any time someone challenges him. Then that would be pretty queer.

Last week Lindsay Lohan demanded Avril Lavigne be thrown out of the Chateau Marmont. It didn’t happen. Over the weekend, Lindsay tried to pull the same stunt. This must be her “thing” now. Going on power trips when she has no power. It’s the equivalent of a two-year-old trying to break through a steel door by pounding on it with their tiny fists.

At 1Oak over the weekend, New York Rangers Aaron Voros, Sean Avery and Voros’ girlfriend, Jessica Stam, were having a nice time when Lindsay threw a drink over Jessica and tried to have them kicked out. A source said Lindsay wanted to be at their table near the DJ but didn’t want to sit with Aaron. Lindsay claimed Aaron was her ex boyfriend. Voros denied knowing her. People tried to calm her down and Lindsay shortly after.

This chick is batty. Lindsay probably can’t even get a comped ice cream at Baskin Robbins anymore. I’m surprised the club bosses didn’t just laugh and make a wanking motion to each other while she was whining.

Below is Jessica Stam. Lindsay must be crazy to think the club would kick out this girl. She’s 100 times hotter than Lindsay. Lindsay might as well have asked them to set their penis on fire.

Dallas forward and sometimes Vogue intern Sean Avery has been suspended indefinitely from the NHL following unsolicited and “inappropriate” comments he made to reporters regarding his ex-girlfriends Elisha Cuthbert and Rachel Hunter.

Fox News reported that following a morning skate in Calgary, Alberta, Tuesday Avery approached a group of reporters, asked if a camera was present and then said: “I’m really happy to be back in Calgary; I love Canada. I just want to comment on how it’s become like a common thing in the NHL for guys to fall in love with my sloppy seconds.”

Avery will be out until he appears before NHL commissioner Gary Bettman for a hearing. Cuthbert is now dating Dion Phaneuf and Hunter is now with Jarrett Stoll.

I don’t know how hockey players deal with people calling their girlfriends “sloppy seconds” but I believe a sternly worded letter is in order. From what I’ve seen, hockey players are calm, cool, collected and rarely vent their frustrations through physical altercations.

[Image via Splash News]

Elisha Cuthbert has broken up with her N.Y. Ranger fianceé Sean Avery after more than two years together. Avery decided to make the most out of his newfound freedom by hitting on Paris Hilton.

“He hit on her three times, but every time, Paris would give him disgusted looks and move away from his creepy shoulder-brushing and close-talking ways,” said our snitch. The rebuffed Avery hit on other blonds. “You could tell he just wanted to hook up,” said the spy.

Nonsense. Sweet talking Paris Hilton into having sex with you should be as easy as convincing a kid you have candy in your car. Christ, it’s not like you’re trying to find a cure for cancer. You would have a harder time tying your shoe. Sorry, Sean Avery. You fail at life.