Not exactly. Wendy Maguire, Tobey’s mom, and his brother, Weston, 15, have been tapped to star in a reality series called Growing Up Maguire. The series will follow Wendy, a single mother, through the trials and tribulations of raising her children in the entertainment industry. Weston will be randomly skateboarding, dirt biking and snowboarding through the series.

Aren’t reality shows usually for stars who are about to hit rock bottom and need the money. I know Tobey isn’t going to be in this, but he has enough from Spider-Man to take care of his mom and brother. At least enough so that his family doesn’t have to debase themselves on a reality show. Not only that, Tobey Maguire isn’t exactly the most exciting celebrity out there. The show is going to be 30 minutes of his mom calling him and asking what he wants in his lunchbox tomorrow. Your wrists might slit themselves after watching this.

I’m not sure what I’m doing up at 8 AM in the morning on a Saturday, but the big news this hour is Tobey Maguire and his wife Jennifer Meyer birthed their second child today. A baby boy.

“I can confirm the Maguires had a baby boy today and the family is healthy and happy,” the rep adds.

I’m told the birth was really hard at first, but once Jennifer calmed Tobey down using the breathing exercises they learned, everything went smoothly. Tobey’s girlish shrieks were heard only once this time around. When he saw the baby crowning. What a trooper.

Yesterday, Tobey Maguire and his wife were being blinded by the paparazzi as they tried to drive away. When the paps weren’t letting them through, Tobey got pissed and yelled, “Get the fuck out of the way. I can’t see. There are cars here motherfuckers.”

Tobey has more patience than I do because I would have ran them over. During my trial, I’ll just show the jury this video and everyone who sees it will think they’re at a rave or something. There’s a distinct possibility one of the jurors may even break out their glow sticks.

Tobey Maguire was heading to his hotel in Paris when he slapped a camera out of a fan’s hand who held it in front of him for a picture. I walked around the street today asking people their feelings about this and the consensus was Tobey Macguire is a dick. Granted, some people disagreed. They thought Tobey was being more of an asshole or a douchebag.

Note: I think Tobey said “Don’t touch me dude.” Might have helped if he said it in French.