The cast of True Blood had their premiere party in LA last night and the entire cast attended. The most notable was Evan Rachel Wood because she chopped her hair off and got a pixie cut like Emma Watson. Ugh. Now what am I going to pull on?

Of course, Evan Rachel Wood recently came out as a bisexual which clearly means she has to dress the part. She told Esquire,

“Yes,” she said when asked if she dates women. “I grew up in love with David Bowie. So I was always into very androgynous things. Guys, girls… I’m into androgyny in general.”

Well congratulations. Mission accomplished. You’ve succeeded in looking androgynous and letting me know lesbians prefer chicks who could be mistaken for dudes. Which is strange because I always thought that much like straight men, they’d be really into hot chicks.

Lindsay Lohan put on vampire fangs and made a desperate cry last week for the producers of True Blood, an HBO show that’s even trumped some shows on network tv in ratings, to stunt cast her. She posted on TwitPic, “my dream ….. true blood is AMAZING.”

No one is going to hire this crazy bitch. Any vampire biting into her neck would be coked out for days. Plus, you know Lindsay only wants on the show to bang Alexander Skarsgård. Except, he’s hooking-up with Evan Rachel Woods so she’ll need to take care of that problem. Preferably in a tub of Jell-O.

Anna Paquin went topless on the season premiere of True Blood yesterday (I could have sworn she did this already). So, for those of you who haven’t seen Anna Paquin topless, but really want to see Anna Paquin topless, here you go. Enjoy, pervs.

I haven’t watched last night’s episode yet which is why I had to close my eyes while writing this so I wouldn’t see any spoilers. Please refrain from telling me that that makes no sense. I don’t want to hear a word out of you, you Negative Nancy.

Click the header for the uncensored version.

That Julian King story was just too depressing to leave up [as the last post...] so here’s Lizzy Caplan of Cloverfield naked on HBO’s True Blood for the second week in a row. Her dedication to giving me an erection is much appreciated in these hard times. 15 pics after the jump.