Jessica Alba is getting too skinny

Dear Jessica Alba,

You may not know me, but I know you. I’ve watched most of your movies and spent many sleepless nights typing “nude jessica alba” into Google. Your most memorable movie for me was Idle Hands. You wore an angel costume and showed everyone why you belonged in the upper echelon of sexy. You have since indulged my many fantasies through your movies. The latest being a cowgirl stripper in Sin City. Although I cannot remember a single plot line to your movies, I am sure they were great.

Allow me to move quickly to my point. I want you to know that if you continue on the path of Kate Bosworth look-a-like, I am afraid our relationship must end. But you say looking like you need to be sponsored for one cent a day is sexy. I must politely disagree and point out that if you don’t eat more than a salad a day, you may lose the sexy.

On behalf of the general male population, I urge you to return to your former curvasceous body. In fact, I need you to do this because I’ll be damned if I have to spend time and effort in finding another girl to imagine while having sex with both myself and other women. And if you cannot even satisfy me in my masturbatory fantasies, then we may have to sever our ties. For our sakes, I hope it doesn’t come to that.

Yours truly,
Men of the World

Here she is playing around with her dog. The dog was probably freaked out that the bone he was about to bury was running away from him. Alright, not that skinny, but she’s well on her way.

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bored rich
bored rich
16 years ago

seriously, the girl always looks like she stepped out of an 80’s zombie movie,. not cuz shes thin ( and thats an opinion, she looks like a 12 year old boy from the front, and star jones from the back pre surgery. seriously because she looks like that red-hoodied chick in the film “the hills have eyes” the remake.
sorry, shes just NOT MY type, not with that cellulite ridden ass

16 years ago

My God is she looking bad :(
The thing is that only this kind of body looks decorative on movie.

13 years ago

yeah totally agree, i was just seing the machete movie her last movie and i was shocked, what happened to the curvy girl of idle hands and the sexy beach girl from in to the blue? wtf she even saids that she was ashamed of her teenage body cause she was to curvy an fat, and i thought wtf is wrong with her thats why i keeped following his career only for that sexy an delicious body, so sad.