Paris Hilton is Beastmaster

Paris Hilton almost lost her pet ferret the other day. Much to the dismay of the ferret, she found it. Last I checked, it was illegal to have a ferret as a pet in California. Sadly, I can understand how she gets away with this stuff since explaining the law to Paris Hilton is like explaining how a television works to a mentally retarded two year old. In the end, you get so frustrated that you just want to take them by the shoulders and shake them until they have irrevocable brain damage, but you don’t because you realize someone beat you to the punch.

Here she is coaxing it back. By the looks of it, she must have dropped a line of coke on its head.