I thank the man who invented beach volleyball from the bottom of my heart. Without him, women like Molly Sims would have never thought to hit a ball back and forth over a net in her bikini and she would never have given me this special moment of watching two hot half naked women hug. I’d like to believe that after they finished, they went to the locker room and discovered that there was only one working shower. Then there would be a lot of giggling, a lot of steam, really soapy water and me sitting in corner tenting my fingers saying “exxcccellent”.
I would also like to thank the man who discovered alcohol. Without him, I would see far less attractive people and would have never spent so much quality time with my toilet.