In other news

This god awful boring news day is almost over. Now it’s time to sit back and watch shows from Monday like Prison Break and Heroes.

Paris Hilton posed with Judi Dench. Judi was looking the other way unaware she was about to be mauled by a slut.

Bill Cosby settled a civil suit by a woman claiming he drugged and sexually assaulted her. No word on if any Jello was used.

Paris Hilton not only took a picture with Judi Dench guerilla style, but she also has man hands. Great for working with the hoe. Or hand jobs since she’s such a tease.

Carmen Electra made out with Joan Jett. Um, ok.

Nip/Tuck goes gray. How much do I love you Nip/Tuck, let me count the ways.

Abi Titmuss interviews Keeley Hazel. Bonus: If I read right, Keeley Hazel has done hardcore. Don’t argue. You’ll spoil my fantasy.

Anna Kournikova is wasting away into nothing. She’s almost off my list.