Svedka vodka has agreed to sponsor Lindsay Lohan’s 21st birthday in Vegas. The deal could net her up to 7 figures. Other sponsors include, Pure at Caesar’s Palace and Treasure Island’s Social House restaurant. The freshly rehabbed starlet’s rep says they don’t know anything about it because they aren’t planning the party. Her lawyer was a little more forthcoming. When asked, he took off his shirt and proceeded to swing it around his head shouting, “This should be one of the best parties ever.”
Even though seven figures seems like a lot, it’s not. Yea, you could live off that for years and you probably won’t ever make that much in your lifetime since people aren’t tripping over themselves to sponsor you, but let’s face it, you can’t even buy a decent house with that. I’m talking about one with the bare necessities like a tennis court, basketball court, bowling alley, caged tigers and a Pegasus. The best you can afford is one with a jacuzzi. And that’s fine I guess… if you enjoy hearing me laugh at you while I fly by on my winged stallion.
Here’s Lindsay being sober, maybe.
The Rest of the Web, Friday, 4.28.17
Sign Me Up for This Napping Fitness Class
Beyoncé Ordering Food Has Turned into a Meme
Kids Who Want to Waste Thousands of Dollars Studying a Fake ‘Game of Thrones’ Language Are in Luck
Jennifer Lawrence Is Totally Marrying Darren Aronofsky This Summer
Katy Perry’s New Song Empowers Women To Have Food Sex or Something
Ja Rule’s $12,000 Ticket Music Festival Ends in ‘Lord of the Flies’ Nightmare With Kidnapping and Mugging Rumors
Obama’s First Joke About Trump Was Perfect
Rita Ora’s Gonna Regret This Outfit One Day
It’s Kylie Jenner’s Soulless Dead Eyes…And Her Sexy Midriff!
Kendall Jenner Gets Camera Shy Which Is Really Ironic
R. Kelly Sued for Nailing Sheriff Deputy’s Wife and Giving Her Chlamydia