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Mena Suvari jogs with her shaved head

Mena Suvari

Mena Suvari was spotted running from her career in a skull bikini top with one pant leg up wearing insect sunglasses in Malibu. I swear. This chick is trying her hardest to look ugly. If I didn’t know who this was, I’d be thinking, “Aw, how sweet, a retard buying her own food.” Not retarded in the “that’s stupid” sense, but retarded in the “she’ll put out for a packet of Sweet ‘n Low” sense. You know, retarded retarded.

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  • Alright…show of hands. Who’s the hottest white chick with a buzz cut, Mena Suvari, Sinead O’connor, or Samantha Morton from ‘Minority Report’?

  • By the way…nice ass Mena. (wild cat growl, whip crack, whip crack)

  • In the words of the great Hip-Hop philosopher, Ghostface Killah, Mena’s “…backyard is bangin’ like a benzy!”

  • For all Hip Hop-linguistically challenged, “backyard” means ass, “bangin'” means sexy or awesome, and “benzy” means Mercedes-Benz. Okay, that’s the end of today’s lesson.

  • I think someone loves Mena Suvari. I heard first comes love, then comes marriage. Then comes something in a baby carriage. A flaming bag of poo perhaps?

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