Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant

Jamie Lynn Spears

16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears revealed to OK! Magazine that she is pregnant in a six page interview to be released tomorrow. TMZ has confirmed it. I’m now taking bets on who’s dumber and a bigger whore. Jamie Lynn or Britney Spears. Odds are still in Britney’s favor.

She tells the mag that the father is Casey Aldridge, who she has been dating for some time and first met at church. Brit’s younger sister, star of Nick’s “Zoey 101,” says she’s keeping the baby. Sources tell us that she has not yet told her older sister.

Nickelodeon released this statement.

“We respect Jamie Lynn’s decision to take responsibility in this sensitive and personal situation. We know this is a very difficult time for her and her family, and our primary concern right now is for Jamie Lynn’s well being.”

Is there anything that can keep this family from breeding? Some sort of clandestine operation perhaps? The Spears family is polluting the gene pool. That’s some sort of crime against humanity, right? Are there no government sanctions we can put on them? I’m really confused.

The only good thing that’ll come out of this teen pregnancy is that Britney’s kids can play with Jamie’s kids. They can discuss politics, stocks, the best way to run head first into a wall, eating glue and so on. In about 8 years, they may even be ready to socialize with normal kids and maybe even be ready to, dare I say it, attend kindergarten.

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