Paris Hilton is drunk and not musical

Paris Hilton promoted The Hottie and the Nottie in Boston by singing drunk to onlookers. Despite me not being able to hear how or what she sang because I can’t time travel… yet…, I’ll just assume it was a horrible rendition of her old single, Stars Are Blind, which made everybody’s ears bleed. I’m also going to assume at one point during her performance something inappropriate happened. The studio would have been better off promoting this movie by having Hulk Hogan banging a gong with a cat.

Update: Apparently she did sing Stars are Blind and something inappropriate almost did happen. Her nipple almost slipped out. I must be psychic.