I’ve long subscribed to the belief that Adriana Lima is one of the lesser Victoria’s Secret models. These pictures don’t change my perception at all. Her body is “bangin'” as the kids say these days, but her face is rat-like. Every time I see her, I picture her nibbling on a piece of cheese or scurrying into a little hole. This is what I imagine Master Splinter from The Ninja Turtles would look like if he got a sex change, boob job, laser hair removal and facial reconstructive surgery. That is to say, given the chance, I would hit that without hesitation.