ESC

Bikinis don’t fall off of Mary-Kate and Ashley

Olsens bikini

Even though their rail-thin bodies will never be able to withstand the Santa Ana winds short of nailing their feet to the ground, I’d still hit Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen without hesitation and with much gusto. There’s nothing hotter than the sound of ribs cracking and pelvis’ breaking during sex. Banging the Olsens would roughly sound like eating a bowl of Rice Krispies except with them, I won’t be the only one moaning with pleasure.

SkinnySkinnySkinnySkinnySkinny

  • capt. cornhole

    Even if these two were 50, I couldn’t look at them without feeling like a pedophile.
    I see hips and tiny tits, but that still makes them look like a pair of 13 year olds.

    I feel dirty and right now. I’m expecting Chris Hanson to be asking me to have a seat for an exit interview.

    “OOpps”

  • That Rice Krispies joke was ace. ;-)

  • lol. what the f*ck is going on. standing there with those little legs gaped open like that.

    that’s a good way to get your tiny t-what screwed.

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